I've found Michael Jackson!

So I finally finished watching the latest season of Nip/Tuck. Now there's a show that really went off the rails, right? Christian marrying Liz? That's about as likely as me and Joe Cotton getting together. Urgh.

Anyway, while I was trudging through the last few episodes of season five - once I've started something, I cannot stop, no matter how bad it gets (unless you're called Heroes) - my mind started wandering to weird and wonderful places.

In between thinking up new flavours of muffins - cream cheese, peanut butter and tamarillo, anyone? - I started thinking about the latest edition of Q magazine. It's got the worst photo of Jacko you will ever see on the cover. Don't they want to sell magazines?

Anyway, I started wondering who would be able to play Michael Jackson in a can't-be-too-far-away-now movie based on his life. There aren't many who would qualify. Willem Dafoe? Too white. Don Cheadle? Too black. Tom Cruise? Close, but a bit too weird. Janet Jackson? Too masculine.

And then Nip/Tuck's ultra-annoying character Matt - played by John Hensley - came on screen. And I thought, 'Eureka! There's the guy to do it!' Obviously he'd only be able to play post-op Jacko, from 1995 onwards.

That jaw, that pale face, those sunken features - it's a perfect fit. You know I'm right.

But that's not quite where my genius ended. Christian's son Wilbur would be perfect for the role of Jacko circa his Jackson 5 era. He's cute as a button and he's got a perfect afro. All he needs to nail is the 'inappropriate-gyration-from-a-nine-year-old' dance and he's a shoo-in.

Who do you think should play Michael Jackson in a movie based on his life?

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JeM   #1   12:52 pm Jul 27 2009

Love Nip/Tuck and have often thought that the dude who played Matt must have been Jacko's love child. Glad you can see it too!

paulimus_prime   #2   02:03 pm Jul 27 2009

So when are you marrying Joe Cotton? haha

Asha   #3   02:06 pm Jul 27 2009

He's a dead ringer! Freaky.

craig   #4   08:49 am Jul 28 2009

Asha - 'Dead' ringer... nice one!

kebabette   #5   10:02 am Jul 28 2009

By the by, have you seen ScaryNipTuckEyebrowDude (tm) in the movie Teeth? It's vajayjay dentata fabulosity! And he's a creep in that too.

Nards   #6   12:44 pm Sep 30 2009

God Bless Michael...and in no way do I say this disrespectfully..I think...Johnny Depp in Charlie in The chocolate factory was pretty damn close to MJ..the whole weird manor..i think with a bit of hollywood makeup..Johnny would be primo.. I miss him so much..

constantinc   #7   08:43 pm Oct 05 2009

NOBODY!MICHAEL JACKSON IS UNIC!WE LOVE YOU,MIKE,SO MUCH!

marson   #8   07:22 pm Apr 05 2010

Sounds like a good idea

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