A little battler and her helpers

Cherie Morgan was a special woman – that much is obvious. While she was alive she faced numerous obstacles head on and defeated doctor’s predictions. Now, nine months after her death, mum Davina Dyne talks to East & Bays Courier editor Melanie Louden in the hope that Cherie’s life will continue to impact people.

Davina Dyne is sharing her daughter’s story so that people who are disabled, and their families, will know help is available to make life a little easier.

"This is about Cherie’s legacy and saying thank you to the people who really helped her," Davina says.

Cherie Morgan was 30 years old when she died on September 5, 2008.

She had multiple disabilities.

"I knew there was something major wrong at three months when she started crying for days and nights on end.

"The doctors couldn’t figure out what was wrong. They just wrote ‘failure to thrive’ and sent her off to another specialist."

Cherie was two-and-a-half years old when, after three weeks of intensive investigation and tests, doctors finally found a large pear-shaped tumour on her spine.

"It was wrapped around the aorta and major blood vessels. When she was diagnosed they told me she would die, that it wasn’t operable because of where it was."

The tumour meant Cherie grew slowly – some years she didn’t grow much more than half a centimetre

Cherie also had a severe skin condition and in the weeks before she died her weight dropped from 25kg to 20kg.

Right from the start Davina knew Cherie, the eldest of three children, would be a fighter.

The family were living on the North Shore at the time and Cherie went to school at the Wilson Home, Belmont primary and intermediate schools and Takapuna Grammar. Cherie always accepted who she was and never complained.

"I don’t wish I was normal – you just are what you are," she told her mum just weeks before she died.

"I was born with health problems and this was something that was just beyond my control," Cherie said.

Spontaneously the neuroblastoma, or childhood cancer, gradually began shrinking and in 2000 Davina and Cherie were thrilled to be told the tumour had vanished completely.

But Cherie still had to live with the permanent effects the tumour had left on her body.

Davina and Cherie moved to Mt Wellington 12 years ago and Davina juggled a hectic life of being a solo mum to her disabled daughter, studying fulltime at university and working part-time as a caregiver.

"Cherie loved going out. But there was no way she could go out on her own. I’d take her out when I could but I used to think, if only there was a way for her to get out during the day."

Davina eventually heard about Lifewise Homecare Services in 2007 and says this was a turning point in her daughter’s life.

Lifewise is a nonprofit organisation that provides care to 1700 clients by helping them with any everyday tasks they need assistance with, like showering and preparing meals, or weekly or monthly activities like grocery shopping or housework.

An important part of Lifewise is the companionship that comes with the service – something that Cherie benefited from immensely.

"The day she found out about Lifewise was when her outlook on life changed," Davina says.

"She just sparked up. It gave her a whole new lease on life. They helped her in a way that I couldn’t."

Cherie spent time with a couple of carers before she was paired up with Kirby Going. When they met, Kirby was a 22-year-old university student who had joined Lifewise looking for a rewarding part-time job.

"They really connected," says Davina, "It was really something special to see Cherie and Kirby.

"Cherie trusted Kirby in every way. There couldn’t have been anybody better than Kirby."

Davina says Lifewise meant Cherie could do many things she couldn’t do before. She could go out with a friend, go shopping, go out for lunch or coffee.

"It was a huge relief knowing she had that outlet. There was peace of mind for me. She could be independent."

Kirby originally came over one day a week to offer companionship, but this soon grew to more frequent visits to help out with shopping, housework and cooking as Cherie’s needs changed.

Kirby says her nine months with Cherie quickly saw a working relationship develop into a true friendship.

"She wanted to go out shopping with a friend – something people take for granted," says Kirby.

A clot in one of Cherie’s tiny veins early last year cut off the blood supply to her digestive system. Cherie’s body gradually started shutting down.

Nurses from Mercy Hospice spent five weeks keeping her comfortable.

"She knew what was happening," says Davina.

"But even in the depth of all this there was still hope.

"She wouldn’t give up."

Kirby says it was a privilege to have been a part of Cherie’s life "in those last days, weeks and
months".

"It was an experience and I will never forget her. She was definitely a person you could never forget."

Cherie passed away peacefully at home in her mother’s arms on September 5.

Kirby says it is important people of all ages sign up for such crucial and rewarding jobs.

"I always wanted a job where I could help people. You’re helping people in the community and getting a reward out of it."

Nine months after her daughter’s death Davina says it is time to give recognition where it is due.

"To Lifewise for one – to raise awareness of what they do and how they can help and to Mercy Hospice. Lifewise helped Cherie live the way she wanted to live. Hospice helped her go the way she wanted to."

Davina says families, especially solo-parent families who are in similar situations, need to know there is help out there.

There is help out there

Lifewise Homecare Services case manager Heather Mitchell says too many people are struggling and don’t know help is available.

Lifewise is a charitable organisation that provides a variety of services to the community.

Primarily it offers support to older adults and people with disabilities and rehabilitation needs to enable them to continue living in their own homes as independently as possible.

"More than you think, people aren’t aware of what’s available to them."

Ms Mitchell says people should ask questions.

"Don’t be afraid to ask and seek out some answers. Do I qualify? Can I have this?"

Lifewise, the community and social services division of Methodist Mission Northern, has 1700 clients cared for by 250 staff.

Services range from assistance with personal care, including hygiene, dressing and grooming, general housework, laundry, meal preparation, shopping, exercise plans, companionship and outings and childcare.

The services are provided in conjunction with the Auckland District Health Board, Health Ministry and the Accident Compensation Corporation and full or part subsidies may be available after a formal assessment. Families can also pay privately for Lifewise services.

Mercy Hospice Auckland, a registered charity, is another agency that is on hand to help patients and families through difficult times.

It provides a range of specialist community palliative care and hospice services for people facing life limiting illnesses.

Community nurse Jill Bennett says palliative care is about caring for people when a cure is no longer possible.

Hospice services are available in the patient’s home or at inpatient facilities.

Anyone who wants to know if Lifewise or Mercy Hospice can help them or someone they know should contact their GP or nurse or contact Lifewise on 623-7631.

Anyone interested in joining the Lifewise team as a support worker can contact Julie Reilly on 623-6562.

- © Fairfax NZ News