Allegory about a burden deals with abuse at last

MICHELLE COOKE

Writing a picture book was a therapeutic way for an Ellerslie resident to overcome her experience of sexual abuse.

Meredith Brocklebank now hopes her published book In the Realm of the Golden Queen can help other women deal with abusive experiences.

A victim of sexual assault at a party when she was 15, she hid what happened to her for many years, refusing to tell even her family.

But the vivacious writer has come to accept what happened and see it as separate to who she is.

"I think if you've had these experiences then you'll always think you've done something wrong – it goes along with: `If only. If only I'd been there. If only I did that'.

"But it actually makes no difference. No matter what you did, you did not deserve that," she says.

Victims of abuse often feel they were part of the problem, and it takes a while to realise this is not the case, Mrs Brocklebank says.

She reached a milestone when she told the story of her book to her counsellor.

"It's an allegory," she says. "I was telling her my issues but as a fairy story."

The mother-of-two says by creating an allegory to her story she was finally able to feel free.

"It put all the pieces together and was kind of like a summary session," the first-time author says.

"It was a really freeing experience by the time I got to the end of the book. It was like: `I can go on and be okay now'."

The book follows a queen, who has been given an old man's burden that she is left to carry.

Mrs Brocklebank says the idea behind the book is to allow others to free themselves of the burden of their experiences with abuse.

The Women's Refuge and some counsellors are using it as a tool with people they see.

- © Fairfax NZ News