Brave battler lived life to the full

CARALISE MOORE

Tristan Clifford's ashes were scattered at Riverhead Forest last weekend after the 35-year-old died of bowel cancer.

Sister Rebekah Clifford recalls his life and fight against cancer.

"Our family grew up in Riverhead and lived in Rodney most of our lives," she says.

"We're a family of six, mum Annette, dad Steve and the boys Rhys, Jarid, Tristan and I. We all went to Riverhead Primary School.

"Tristan and I were the closest growing up. We played with Tonka trucks and Dinky toys in the dirt and grass.

"At 15, he went up to Riverhead Forest and asked for a job working with Hansen Logging. He lied about his age but was cocky enough to land the job.

"He was amazing with an excavator and gained a lot of respect from the older guys because he was such a hard worker. I think he was about 10 or 12 when he started a lawnmowing run around Riverhead.

"He loved trucks from when he was little and his room was covered in truck posters.

"He also had a CB radio in his cars so he could listen in and chat with the truck drivers."

Tristan moved to the Gold Coast a few years ago and started his own successful earthmoving business.

He had loads of "toys" over the years – jetskis, cars, quad bikes, trail bikes and more.

"His motto was `live hard, play hard'," Rebekah says. "He made a huge impression on people."

Tristan and his brothers often went to Manar Park four-wheel-drive and motorcycle adventure park in Queensland.

"They love him so much they're naming a track after him," Rebekah says.

In early 2008, Rebekah's mum called saying Tristan had been rushed to accident and emergency and had an eight-hour operation to remove cancer.

"Tristan had been a bit crook for a couple of months with stomach cramps and strange bowel habits," Rebekah says. "He was told he had gluten intolerance or irritable bowel syndrome. I think because of his age they dismissed bowel cancer."

Doctors said the operation and chemotherapy were successful.

He lived and played harder than before, went to the gym twice a day and looked and felt the best he had in his life, Rebekah says.

"One of his mates told me Tristan had the best year of his life and did everything he wanted to do. About a-year-and-a-half after the first operation Tristan was told his cancer was back, which was a huge shock to everyone, probably most of all to him. "Last year I received a call from mum saying that I needed to visit him because the cancer had taken a turn for the worse.

"I went at the end of September for a couple of days. I was absolutely shocked. My brother, who I had last seen about two years previously, was now yellow-green all over and looked like a 90-year-old concentration camp victim.

"Tristan told me the story of his cancer and it just broke my heart. Out of all of us kids I couldn't believe he was the one that was going first."

Tristan was allergic to chemotherapy, so the one thing that could have saved him made him worse, Rebekah says.

On November 1, Tristan died after being put into an induced coma to stop the pain.

"I wasn't there when he passed," Rebekah says. "I was trying to get a flight but no one seemed to have any available. I'd give anything to go back and be there to hold his hand at the last few moments."

Last Saturday, half of Tristan's ashes were scattered in Riverhead Forest at his request. A quarter will be scattered in Australia and a quarter in Canada mid-year. These three places meant the most to him.

The BowelScreening programme trial by the Waitemata District Health Board featured in the Rodney Times on January 12.

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