Nine networking tips
How do you like networking? You might find it easy, you might take it for granted or if you're like me - you find it difficult.
While my children are constantly yelling at me for talking to what they call 'random strangers', put me in a room of strangers and even this gregarious New Yorker freezes up.
I think the key to successful networking is to first help yourself get comfortable in a room filled with many strangers, and then to positively approach every single social situation with the positive thought of 'whom will I meet here'?
As you know, networking isn't about selling and it isn't about promoting yourself in an aggressive manner. It is the art of engaging someone in conversation that hopefully will lead to a mutually beneficial relationship.
Here are nine tips to become a (more?) delightful person to mingle with.
1. Smile, and say "tell me about your business". Use your own words of course, but it works like a charm for me. People love to talk about themselves, they're pleased, flattered and surprised you ask and it's a great way to start a conversation. This leads to point two:
2. Read the newspaper every day. Or should I say Stuff.co.nz? Even if you skim, and read only the top paragraph, you'll have something to talk about with everyone. You'll be able to quote articles by topic and industry in relation to the person you're conversing with.
I don't think I need to mention to look up the host and use the internet to gather information to help you get to know your host and any guests you want to meet. It takes a moment but could give you a leading edge.
3. This tip, along with the next three I learnt from the queen of networking Robyn Henderson from www.networkingtowin.com.au/. She said every networking event has three zones of influence. Therefore where you stand will dictate whom you may meet.
Zone 1 is closest to the registration desk and is where most people hang out. Zone 2, in the middle is where regulars are. Zone 3 - furthest away from the registration and up front by the stage or projector is where the key players are. The spheres of influence (unless they are on duty with meeting and greeting).
4. When you get an invitation - whether it be for a conference, seminar, networking event - don't decide if you want to go solely based on what the speaker /topic will be. Instead think about who is going to be there:
- Peers
- Customers
- Competition
- Prospects
This will change your decision process and make these functions much more attractive because of whom you can meet, network with and learn from.
5. People will think you're interesting if you ask them interesting questions. Here's a trick: move from past to present to future questions. For example:
- Past - So you've been with the company x years. What changes have you seen?
- Present - What challenges do you have?
- Future - What trends do you foresee?
6. Try to spend at least five minutes with each person. This gives enough time for the connection to be made.
The exception of course is if the person starts looking at their watch or around the room. It is better for you to break away gracefully.
7. If you're speaking with someone and want to move on, look for another person or group nearby. Say "Oh that person (or group) looks interesting. Let's ask them to join us".
Then act like a host and introduce whom you are with, stating their name and an interesting piece of information about them as a talking point. As they start to chat, make your exit.
8. Studies show people often forget the first 15 seconds of a conversation so they have already forgotten who you are. At a natural pause in the conversation casually drop in "You may not have caught my name earlier. It's ..."
9. Keep your business cards in your pocket. When the time is right you don't want to spend five minutes hunting though your handbag or briefcase!
Contact Debbie on www.debbiespeaks.co.nz or debbie@debbiespeaks.co.nz
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Ben. You made me laugh. Your comment reminds me of my husband who hates being told what to do (by his wife). Even when it's couched in the softest of words, he takes the contrarian view. Thanks for giving me a smile on a cloudy day. Debbie
Looks like it's just you and me! You don't seem to be generating much traffic. You are either going to have to be more controversial or follow the lead of the Life and Style bloggers and make the columns a bit more sexy. Perhaps you have some views on office romances!
I am not contrary just for the sake of it; I genuinely detest networking functions; they are overrated and usually populated by those who do not have any real work to do, often public servants boosting their CPD hours. I have also survived a working life of 45+ years without networking and by generally ignoring management gurus. Please do not be offended because I am not setting out to be rude, but I do feel that with the advice you offer, if managers, or those with managment aspirations, do not already know the the things you say, then they should pack it in and go and count the knot holes in the garden fence.
It must be very frustrating for you to be confronted with such cynicism and then have Mr Mayo-Smith ignoring your advice. You will just have to work on moulding your six kids!
As a New Yourker are you pleased that Mr Obama has got his healthcare reform through? That's much more interesting than networking.
Well, I guess I better speak up: "I'm here, reading and lovin' the material".
Ben, do you think tv actors get lonely if we don't shout at the screen often enough? I'd guess Debbie gets plenty of visit stats from the blog/website hosts.
"I am not setting out to be rude, but I do feel that with the advice you offer, if managers, or those with managment aspirations, do not already know the the things you say, then they should pack it in" But what if the target of this blog is actually folk with a clever new service or product to sell? They are not trained CEOs with MBAs like you and may appreciate the ideas and tips given here, prt of the university of life.
"I have also survived a working life of 45+ years without networking and by generally ignoring management gurus" Crikey, merely survived? Some folk seek to PROSPER. Some folk ENJOY their working life, especially those running their own business.
"I genuinely detest networking functions; they are overrated and usually populated by those who do not have any real work to do, often public servants boosting their CPD hours." Perhaps you did not choose wisely where to spend your time..? I don't mean to be rude, Ben. And are you actually married? :^)
Often at these events I have no barrow to push, business to conduct, nor connections to make, but you do hear some fascinating accounts of goings on in industries often quite different from your own. Mind you, you could just stay at home and watch Coro.
I am married although I am not sure what that has to do with it. And yes, I have prospered in my working life all without networking and without listening to the well meaning advice from experts on management. I am glad, CF, that you enjoy 'these events'. Personally I have too much work to spend time at them. And if I do not have enough I go out and find it.
Incidentally I do not have MBA and agree with Sir Robert Jones in his opinion of MBAs and those who possess them. If I look back at all the totally uselss management plonkers I have encountered they have all had MBAs.
There you go, Debbie, I got you one more contribution and the comment about MBAs is bound to upset some anally retentive manager.
Ben, pull your head in you old cranky FIGJAM... you mayn't have realised it, but times have changed in the last 45+ years of doing business... Any opportunity to get one's business or their own individual name recognised by their peers or people outside of their peers is worth consideration of the investment, either in time or money...
Sure networking isn't going to necessarily result in Business Nirvana, but it a aspect of business or personal presentation and branding that should never be ignored...
Debbie, another great and insightful blog... Keep them coming, there are plenty of sucessful business peoiple out there who these tips can lend some polish too...
Thanks; nice response, Alberto! I am sure I would know if I did more networking but what is a FIGJAM?
Frak I'm Great Just Ask Me....
Oh dear.... I know what Figjam is, but don't want to be barred from this site! Ask your kids Ben. Had to laugh at Bens comment of 9 good reasons not too.... I'm with the Chamber Of Commerce and we have a ton of networking functions across the year, and Debbies right about the "3 Zones" of guests. One of our members in particular, has also grasped that concept and has mastered the art of grazing Zone 1 and becoming best buddies with newcomers.... why? New clients, that's why. Works for her.
I obtain new clients by referral from existing ones with the trust and rapport I have built up. I would like to add zone 4 - in the corner with a newspaper!
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Thank you; you have provided me with nine excellent reasons for avoiding conferences and similar business gatherings like the plague (which I do anyway) and being trapped by the networking bores.