Los Angeles to New York is a long flight, crossing four time zones in about six hours, and yet, somehow, you're still expected to pay for snacks. My friend Alice recently packed up all her earthly belongings and made this trip, with the optimistic outlook that seems to come naturally to Californians.

She was moving to New York City to start a job as the online editor of a very hip magazine. To say she was excited is an understatement: being a magazine editor was her childhood dream.

But during brunch in the West Village, Alice confided to me that the job wasn't all that it could have been. In fact, she was thinking of quitting.

When I heard this, my eyebrows almost shot off the top of my head.

"Seriously," she said, crunching a piece of bacon. "My boss gives new meaning to the term 'crazy'.  The whole magazine is so badly managed and they don't want to improve in any way. They just don't care."

"What are you going to do now?" I asked.

"I don't know," she said. "I'd like to have another job lined up before I quit this one. My boss is going to kill me for leaving before fashion week, but I just can't do it anymore."

It begs the question: what do you do when your dream job falls flat, especially if you made major sacrifices to pursue it? Is it ungrateful to want more for ourselves? Are we being selfish? Do we expect too much?

"In this ecowhat do you do when your dream job falls flat, especially if you made major sacrifices to pursue it? nomy," we're told, "you should be thankful you have a job at all." Well, yes... But also, no.

Being able to support yourself is important, of course, but anyone who is aware of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs will tell you that once your basic needs are covered, you'll automatically yearn for more. You may have a job, a home, a husband and children, and still wonder, 'Is that all there is?'

If you're young and ambitious, it's not enough to have a job - you have to have the job. There is so much emphasis on a coveted career: a job that doesn't just sound cool, but which gives other people a case of the green-eyed monster. When I was a kid, everyone wanted to be a doctor or a lawyer. These days, we want to be do-it-yourself millionaires, zippy entrepreneurs or wacky internet personalities.

For the people stuck in this trap, the appearance of the job matters more than the reality. But why slave away to impress people you don't even like?

I've always believed that when you do what you love, the money will follow, and what you love may end up surprising you. It may not be "cool", and it's not always everyone else's idea of a brilliant career.

We can't all be superstars, but we can all try to be happy. My husband volunteers on an aircraft carrier, restoring old airplanes, and he absolutely loves it. It brings an extra dimension to his life. Other people choose to work as little as possible in order to maximise their free time. There are so many other ways to enjoy our lives, to extract the maximum juice.

So where does that leave Alice?

"Happiness never used to be my top priority. It was more important to me that I looked like I was happy to other people. That's all flipped.  A few months ago, I would have thought, 'Is this person going to think I'm a failure if I do this or that?' Now, I don't care. I just want to be true to me."

- Sydney Morning Herald