Columnists

Duncan Garner: Gareth Morgan's beached as

The Awaroa campaign is about people power, not playthings for rich people, Duncan Garner says.

COMMENT: Gareth Morgan's a good guy but he really has misjudged the public mood on buying back a beach.

Rosemary McLeod: Rape's a serious crime, not a joke

Steven Joyce was addressing media at Waitangi when a sex toy was hurled at him by a protester.

OPINION: Invoking rape when people annoy us undermines the serious criminality of the real thing.

Finding Walt's wisdom amid the jakes

A daguerreotype of Walt Whitman is displayed at the New York Public Library.

OPINION: Auden last week, Whitman this. Sorry. It must be the time of year.

Bowron: In a froth at cafe owners

If a customer wants trim milk then cafes should serve it, Jane Bowron says.

Cafe owners who refuse to serve trim coffee seem to have forgotten that the customer is always right.

Who killed the Wellington Sevens?

Akira Ioane of New Zealand fends Kwagga Smith of South Africa during the 2016 Wellington Sevens cup final match at Westpac Stadium

"Not I," said the leery, vomiting drunks. "Not I," said the PC fun police. "Not I," said NZ Rugby...

Garner: Idle hands and teen deaths

Duncan Garner says bored teens in small towns can lead to fatal consequences.

COMMENT: There's an old saying that idle hands are the devil's workshop.

Excuse makers shift responsibility for tragedy

The aftermath of a fatal crash on Queen St, Masterton, where two teens were killed.

OPINION: If police were to adopt a policy of non-pursuit, the inevitable consequence is that lawbreakers would be given carte blanche to defy them.

Learning to stick your neck out

A polo neck has no time for people with short necks. It jeers at us.

OPINION: Publicists for NZ Festival Writers Week couldn't possibly have predicted a phobic reaction to the image they're using to drum up interest.

When truth so faultlessly expressed calms the rage

In a wham bam world of iPhones and porn on demand they don't want to read of poetry, writes Joe Bennett.

OPINION: "Poetry," wrote Auden... but let me pause there. That noise you heard was readers leaving.

Cleanliness really is next to godliness

It’s hard to break the habit of a lifetime – a brusque wake-up shower.

OPINION: Research shows a daily shower can dry out skin and wipe out good bacteria.

Is the tail or the dog in charge at city council?

Wellington City Council chief executive Kevin Lavery.

OPINION: What is going on at the Wellington City Council?

Flexible principles help Key, while Labour continues to flounder

Duncan Garner says people want news 24/7, and NewsHub will give it to them.

OPINION: How on earth can Labour beat John Key?

Speak your mind, pay the price

British actress Charlotte Rampling might have cost herself an Oscar by suggesting the Academy had it right with its slate of white nominees this year.

Charlotte Rampling should've knitted a jumper rather than jump in the Oscars race debate, writes Rosemary McLeod.

Red-hot rage at the corporate run-around

Not Joe Bennett, but indicative of his rage.

I lose pens, and sometimes enthusiasm, but rarely my temper, writes Joe Bennett.

The feudal eroticism of a day at the races

High fashion and high heels at Wellington Cup Day.

OPINION: Feudal, erotic, weather vulnerable – a day out at the races is above all else a wonderful 

Garner: It's time to cut the crap

Duncan Garner says it's time to cut the crap on 'voluntary' donations - and start funding schools properly.

OPINION: The idea of a free education is an oxymoron peddled by moron politicians.

Western freedom repaid with vile acts

Police use pepper spray to control supporters of Pegida, Hogesa (Hooligans against Salafists) and other right-wing populist groups as they protest against the New Year's Eve sex attacks in Cologne, Germany.

OPINION: Let me see if I can get this straight. Millions of oppressed, dispossessed Muslims have risked their lives fleeing the Middle East and North Africa.

Park decision no place for a meddling minister

17-stl- Photo  Barry Harcourt.  Minister of Conservation Maggie Barry is about to release 15mth old male takahe "Punchbowl" along with nine other birds at Plateau Creek in Fiordlands Murchison Mountains on Thursday afternoon.

OPINION: Nah, surely the Minister for Culture and Heritage wouldn't personally choose new designers to complete the National War Memorial Park.

Dear employee, let me address your concerns

A brief message from your beloved CEO.

OPINION: A message from your CEO.

Hero to zero, just for one day

Candles, flowers and glitter around David Bowie's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in Los Angeles. Not for Bowie the emotional terrorism of a mega-star's death, with all its cloying hysteria and corny crescendos.

OPINION: Keeping his cancer a secret was yet another star turn in a litany of David Bowie class acts.

All the news you missed on holiday

Surprise couple: Former supermodel Jerry Hall and powerful North Korean oligarch Kim Jong-Un.

SATIRE: Round-up of news you may have missed while you've been off the grid at the bach or beach.

Smooth cycling or an 'aparkalypse' now?

Work on the Island Bay cycleway, which has roused community opposition as well as strong support, is scheduled to finish early this year.

OPINION: Buongiorno! If I had to live in a Wellington suburb other than Newtown, I would choose Island Bay.

Bowie opened the door to other ways of being

Seeing the cover for Aladdin Sane was a transforming moment for Michele A'Court as a teenager in a rural town in 1973.

OPINION: I had thought Bowie was immortal. All those musical metamorphoses had led me to believe he'd always change, but always be there.

Endless nights in white satin

Beck Eleven has the Briscoes blues in her new white sheets.

OPINION: The passage of my new white sheets has been almost as torturous as my rebirth into 2016.

It's nice to get in touch with nature, even if it has claws

Feeding pigeons used to be a tradition in London's Trafalgar Square - until it was banned.

OPINION: Something happened this morning that put me in mind of a saint. I am not big on saints. I know few of their stories and believe fewer.

Bowron: You're only as old as you think (or recall)

Is ageing nothing more than a number?

OPINION: What a bonus discovering I'm a year younger than I thought.

New Zealand has changed - and poverty is real here

Former ACT Party leader Jamie Whyte believes there is no poverty in New Zealand - nor Britain.

OPINION: It wasn't so long ago that foodbanks didn't exist in New Zealand, and the number of homeless was tiny.

Bad taste only the start of the problems with litter

Cigarettes butts dropped on the street end up polluting waterways.

OPINION: New Zealand should issue fines for littering, as Singapore does.

Phoning from space

British astronaut Major Tim Peake speaks with British Prime Minister David Cameron before joining the International Space Station.

OPINION: By now, whatever ridiculous thing you did at Christmas and New Year will be a distant memory.

How the literati DIY

When wordsmith turns blacksmith

OPINION: The only U Bolt I've ever been familiar with is an Olympic sprinter.

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