Insider's guide to stripping
If you have never threatened to give another guy's nana a lap dance, then you really haven't lived.
Sitting in Auckland's SkyCity theatre, Tom Carey, 24, and Jason Fly, 23, are beside themselves with laughter.
I've just asked how their families feel about the budding construction worker and landscape architect turning in their tools for a career tempting women with their . . . ah . . . bodies.
"Dad's a good mate of mine so he's pretty proud of me, he'd be doing the same as me if he was my age," Fly says.
"Mum still questions what I'm doing all the time. I'm actually doing a show next week in my home town, Tauranga. I invited her along and I think she's bringing my nana too so it should be interesting."
Carey interjects: "I'm going to get your grandmother on stage and give her a lap dance."
This is the funniest thing Fly has heard all day.
"It's going to be hilarious, I can't wait," he says.
The pair are the only two New Zealanders in Sydney Hotshots, a male strip show that performs regularly throughout Australia and is here for a month of shows before touring the United States.
A Las Vegas-style revue, it promises "the most erotic and stimulating dance moves ever seen" in a two-hour flurry of black leather, gold g-strings, and Greased Lightening-inspired gyration.
The men regularly perform to crowds of hundreds.
So how do you go to Australia for your OE and end up on stage with your man-parts all trussed up in a g-banger?
"I actually started topless waitering so eased myself into it, and my boss approached me to ask if I'd like to do some stripping, and I said yeah," Carey says.
"I mean the money's good, it looks like fun and it's a bit more exciting than serving drinks so yeah, I snapped it up."
Fly, who went to Sydney as a semi-professional rugby player, had also begun topless waitering at The Vegas Lounge in Sydney.
"I just got influenced into stripping one night at a hen's party, some girls sort of told me to take a few more clothes off for some extra money and I guess it was exciting," he said.
Plucked from the topless waitering scene (who knew there was one of these) the boys quickly had to learn choreographed dance moves, how to shave their legs and that g-strings really are as uncomfortable as they look.
Both their first shows were in front of hundreds of women. Carey forgot the moves, while Fly unknowingly flashed the crowd when he forgot to wear underwear during a solo routine in pair of ripped jeans.
"Mine was horrible," Carey says.
"I actually cringe when I think about it to be honest. It was a big crowd, about 400 girls, we were in Bendigo so it was a small town but big enough to be daunting.
"I had a gold g-string, it wasn't flattering at all it was horrible. I didn't even know most of the routine so it was just really bad."
While they do have to get down to their gruts, it's not a sex show, they say. They don't take everything off. And while it's not unheard of for performers to meet up with women after the show, the Hotshots try and keep it clean.
Fly says: "I've heard of a few stories but . . . na, our show is known to be very professional. To be honest we wouldn't be touring around the world if we were known to be doing that sort of thing.
"Word spread fasts with social media and it doesn't take long to upload a photo."
That said, they agree there's no way you could be a male stripper and also have a girlfriend.
"Just purely because you are travelling and the way the girls act towards you. I don't know girls, any nice girls, who would put up with that," Carey says.
They often have to fend off women who get a little bit grabby, particularly by the end of a performance.
"All the time. You've just got to handle it in a professional way. We do let the girls have a bit of hands on and once they see it at the start it just gets worse and worse, especially when there's alcohol involved."
But guys do come to their shows too - whether it's keep one eye on their own girlfriend, or check out some of the moves.
For the men at home, Carey and Fly say a good stripping routine consists of some crowd-pleasing hip twists, a good singalong track and the right amount of enthusiasm.
"Listen to some music and get the booty shaking with an apron on in the kitchen, that always helps you know," Fly says.
And if all else fails, just take off your clothes.
Try this at home: tips for budding strippers from the Hotshots
1. If you plan to wear a g-string, make sure it fits. You don't want bulges where they shouldn't be
2. Always leave something to the imagination. Don't whip everything off too soon
3. Watch movies for inspiration and reference. Try Magic Mike, with Channing Tatum
4. If in doubt, go in for the lap dance.
5. Always take your socks off
The Sydney Hotshots are touring New Zealand. They're in Auckland's SkyCity tonight, with their last show in Wellington on July 19. Sydneyhotshots.com