It wouldn't be a self-respecting Hollywood hoedown without a nipple slip mid choreographed dance routine.
At the Emmys after party, Sofia Vegara and Dancing With the Stars choreographer Derek Hough rocked out a saucy routine to Footloose.
But it wasn't a case of footloose so much as bust loose as Vergara's nipple freed itself.
"It was a full five minutes of him spinning her around the dance floor," an observer told Us Weekly. "No one could quite believe what they were seeing, nor were they able to take their eyes off of it."
— Sarah Hyland (@Sarah_Hyland) August 26, 2014
No one could take their eyes off Vergara, the 42-year-old star of Modern Family, earlier in the evening too.
In a skit variously described as 'gross', 'sexist' and 'bizarre' Vergara was positioned on an onstage pedestal and spun around, lazy Susan-style "like a pie in a display case".
And this was when her nipples remained safely ensconced in her white Roberto Cavalli 'ironing board' dress.
All the while Bruce Rosenblum, chairman of the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences, waxed lyrical about something, something television while giving Vergara a creepy sidelong look.
"What truly matters," he said, "is that we never forget that our success is based on always giving the viewer something compelling to watch."
Vergara later hit back at criticism that she was objectified in the gag.
"I think its absolutely the opposite," she told Entertainment Weekly. "It means that somebody can be hot and also be funny and make fun of herself. I think it's ridiculous that somebody started this-I know who she was-who has no sense of humour [and should] lighten up a little bit."
We have no idea who Vergara was referring to. Perhaps she had a puff of Sarah Silverman's 'pot' vape and was feeling a little paranoid.
Silverman, a teetotaler who colour-coordinated her weed-coloured dress with her weed, showed off her stash to a stunned looking E! host Giuliana Rancic.
"I've got my phone, pot and gum," she said showing off her portable vaporiser filled with marijuana.
"I don't drink, I'm a light weight but I'll have a puff here and there and at the Governor's Ball [the official Emmys after party] what have you."
Silverman later denied being, as Anna Kendrick eloquently put it #HAF A.K.A "high as f**k", on the red carpet.
Silverman is Barefoot and #HAF Live your life girl!
— Anna Kendrick (@AnnaKendrick47) August 26, 2014
Instead, she told TMZ, she waited, like a responsible adult, until the after party to get high.
"I had a pot vaper pen thing for later... I have a little puffaroonie at the end of the night, when all is said and done, because I'm a grown woman."
Silverman said she'd enjoyed the night but the highlight, she said deadpan, was talking to the TMZ journo.
Silverman seemed subdued, despite her earlier win in the "writing, variety special" category for "Sarah Silverman: We Are Miracles". Naturally mellow or otherwise, the Emmys seem to elicit little excitement in general.
A recent study by the University of Southern California found that 73 per cent of Americans say they're not "overly excited" by the award show.
Whether or not the Emmys remain relevant is arguable, but it is safe to say that the odd nipple slip and trashbag never go out of fashion in Hollywood.
- Sydney Morning Herald
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