Today's post is by special guest blogger Rohani Alexander, who is married to a non-reader.
Things started well. Dinner, wine, All Blacks on the telly.
The morning after, on his walk of shame to the bathroom, my now Dear Husband noticed them. Books. Shelf upon shelf of children's classics, literary classics, university texts, fantasy sagas, culinary tomes and more. Macbeth to Milly Molly Mandy, Artemis Fowl to Art of the High Renaissance. He admitted then to being "not much of a reader".
Fast-forward eight years. Dinner, no wine, toddler sprawled in sleep like Jesus crucified on a pillow, nothing on the telly. On his walk to bed from the bathroom, DH catches sight of me furtively turning pages. Any one of a number of questions follows: 
"How long are you going to read for?"
"When are you going to turn the light out?"
"You're not seriously going to read, are you? Do you know what time it is?"
"I thought you said you were tired?"
Recently, I was reading a book that made me laugh out loud. Several times. From the other side of the bed came a muffled: "That doesn't sound like the sort of book you should read at bedtime."
Many women fantastise about sharing a bed with Channing Tatum or Christian Grey. I fantasise about lying in bed reading a book, next to a man who is also reading a book. Close friends and family have admitted they thought that, if anything, I'd at least end up with someone who reads. DH has actually apologised for not being a reader. He won't apologise for the logic of the following conversation, had during a Being A Mummy Is Too Hard moment:
"Do you think you're getting enough sleep?"
"[Icily] Are you trying to suggest I should stop reading in bed?"
"No. You can read as much as you like. Just go to bed at 7.30."
I long ago accepted that DH is not, and will not ever be, a reader. I still love him because he is wonderful. He still loves me even though he doesn't understand why I read the cereal box, the junk mail, or the end credits, or why I can't sleep without reading. Even though he is sometimes rudely told, "You should know better than to interrupt me when I'm at the end of my book. Shut up."
Are you living with a non-reader too? Or would that be a dating dealbreaker for you?
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I read, my husband does mysterious computery stuff. Neither of us understands why (or in my case what) the other is doing what they are doing.
It makes for a happy marriage.
haha-I laughed all the way through this, especially aout the "turning the light off" After 17 years of mariage, my wife still struggles with having a bedside light on until 2 in the morning as I devour my books. I have tried backlit tablets, but they hurt the eyes, but love my Kindle, which can hold 1500 books, so no hunting through the room looking for my next literary fix!
My partner and I are both massive readers and our house is full of bookcases - couldn't imagine sharing my life with someone who didn't understand the thrill of reading!
My DH used to read MANUALS in bed while I read my books. He has progressed to biographies of motorbike riders or racing car drivers..... and sometimes with fingers crossed, I see him looking at Cruise brochures. Its all about compromise I think.
My SpousalUnit was not allowed to read much when she was young, as there were always chores to do, so now she is an avid (if occasional) reader. I was the opposite (allowed to read as much as I liked, few chores), but now read less than I used to. The nett result is we both read about the same number of books, but I spend a lot more time (like now) browsing teh interwebs and reading stuff on there. (THe big difference is almost all the stuff I read online is not engaging and I forget it almost instantly).
I've dated a few non-readers and it was a giant turn-off for me. One of my favourite memories of my husband and I when were dating was a lengthy conversation about our favourite scenes from just about every book by Roald Dahl. We just bought the box set of A Song of Ice and Fire to read together (I'm the faster reader, so I get to start first).
Would your man be interested in graphic novels? I just finished Watchman... it was fantastic!
I was living with a non-reader, I converted her. Well its perhaps more fair to say I converted a hardly-ever-reader into a slowly-work-through-a-book-a-month reader.
While we have been together she was read through most of the women of the underworld series, the hobbit and the wheel of time series. She also expressed a interest in reading the song of fire and ice series.
That's the first time I've heard about someone being so judgmental about reading. It's one thing not to be a reader and not to really understand the attraction, it's entirely another thing to be so seemingly against it.
My partner is not a fiction reader. He reads some non-fiction, he enjoys documentaries and he enjoys movies, he just doesn't have the wiring to enjoy *reading* fiction. But he understands that I do like to read and that it gives me a chance to relax, unwind and enjoy the end of the day. The Only way I could imagine him being upset/annoyed by it is if all I did was read all day and neglected the other things I have to do. Otherwise, shouldn't he be happy that I'm enjoying myself?
Like Charlie #1 I am married to a non-reader night owl. It's reasonably normal for me to go to bed and read while he stays in the lounge watching something I am not interested in on TV. I tend to keep my reading to the nights when this is the case as I don't think it's fair to be sitting up reading/playing on phones/watching TV while the other person is trying to sleep in the same bed (I've banished the TV from our room for this reason). He understands my need to read, he bought me a Kindle earlier this year and there's $10 in the budget for my weekly Kindle allowance. Likewise we continue to pay for Sky so he has History Channel, National Geographic and Discovery to keep him company.
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I too am living with a non-reader. It works well for us though that he is a nightowl so I go to bed before him anyway, so I read in bed before I sleep without interruption.
In the weekend I love sitting in the sun reading a good book. My partner can't understand my interest in it but he doesn't interupt or mock. He is more interested in those quiet moments, in watching tv series, he doesn't understand why I don't have the same interest in doing that.
We balance each other well at the end of the day, he sees pictures on the screen watching tv series, I imagine the scenes in my head when I read. We both enjoy the stories it is just a different medium