What the Kiwi gossip mags say
Thanks to Twitter we've grown used to celebrities oversharing personal information. But when it comes to cleaning out her closet, Charlotte Dawson still takes the cake.
Dawson, the Australia's Next Top Model host who left New Zealand a few years back when the gossip got too much for her, tells this week's edition of New Idea she recently had her 15-year-old breast implants removed when one of them started leaking.
That's all well and good, you might say. Let's leave it at that. We've heard enough. These are not the droids you're looking for, so move along.
But not when Dawson's involved. Instead of having private surgery to reduce her 14DD's down to B-cups, the former presenter of the awesomely awful chat show How's Life? invited in a camera crew to document the procedure.
Thanks to the surgery, Dawson claims she can now be buried "organic (and) preservative-free".
"Breast implant surgery is probably one of the most popular surgeries and these days it is incredibly safe, but there are things you need to follow-up on," Dawson tells NI.
"That's why I've decided to share my story."
The fact that she's returning to New Zealand to promote her new series The Contender obviously has nothing to do with it.
Meanwhile, Suzanne Paul's life story continues in Woman's Weekly as the Natural Glow champion does a John Kirwan and reveals a battle with depression that left her so down she couldn't get out of bed.
"Things were so very bleak," Paul says. "When I lost hope of having a better future, when I could no longer see that things would get better, well, that was a real worry."
She may have been in the dog box - but it was her dog that saved her.
"I realised my old dog Walnut would be lost without me ... She would have nobody to give her medicine, and take her on walks where she likes to go. I'm her mum and I knew she needed me."
There's nothing like a cold muzzle in the neck and a slobbery tongue slurping across your face to get you out of bed, no matter how bad you're feeling.
Elsewhere, New Zealand's Miss Universe entrant Ria van Dyke has been bragging about her new celebrity friends after a night out at a Halloween-themed New York nightclub, where she met Heidi Klum and Seal.
But she got snubbed by Kim Kardashian. Ouch.
"I didn't get to talk to Kim ... she was hanging out with a lot of the rappers," van Dyke tells Woman's Day.
"She was surrounded by men, chatting and drinking champagne. She danced a lot and seemed to be having a great time. She's really beautiful."
Perhaps Kardashian's saucy Little Red Riding Hood outfit was getting her all the attention. Kids, don't wear that at home.
Finally, the quote of the week comes from fitness fanatic Terri Irwin: "Post-training, I often have a banana. I also take a multi-vitamin, iron and others. I enjoy goji juice every morning and use protein drinks when there isn't time for steaming chicken."
When does she fit in time for all that crocodile wrangling?
* What do you think of this week's gossip mags? Post your comments below.