Sarah Jessica Parker is teasing Sex and the City 3
With one Instagram post, Sarah Jessica Parker has sufficiently worked the Internet into a tizzy over the possibility of a third Sex and the City movie.
Parker posted a picture of herself trotting out of Bloomingdale's, wearing a simple white dress and gold pumps that recalled the Halston Heritage frock she wore in Sex and the City 2. This was the caption that accompanied it:
"Well. I guess the cat's out of the (little brown) bag. As usual, we will keep you posted on every detail as we are able. I'm under strict gag order until then. Xx, Sj"
Though some wondered if the picture alluded to her shoe line launching at Bloomingdale's, the prevailing consensus seemed to be that she was trolling another chapter in the Sex book.
"Sarah Jessica and I both know what that final chapter is," director Michael Patrick King said in an Entertainment Weekly exclusive in January. "That doesn't mean it will or should be told, but I do think there's one story left. Whether it ever happens is a whole other situation. But there's four girls, and those girls are still in my mind. There are other stories to tell and characters that haven't even been written yet."
Here's a serious question: Why are we doing this? As in, why are we indulging in this particular inevitability?
Did we all forget how terrible the second was, even after grading it on a fanservice curve? We don't say this to be mean; Sex and the City 2 netted a 15 percent rating on Rotten Tomatoes. Even the more magnanimous audience rating didn't crack 50 percent.
These are lines from actual reviews:
"Sex and the City 2 - an enervated, crass and gruesomely caricatured trip to nowhere - seems conceived primarily to find new and more cynical ways to abuse the loyalty of its audience." - Ann Hornaday, The Washington Post
"There's more cleavage in this film than at a pro wrestler's wedding." - Roger Ebert, The Chicago Sun-Times
"Your watch will tell you that a shade less than two and a half hours have elapsed, but you may be shocked at just how much older you feel when the whole thing is over." - A.O. Scott, The New York Times
"Let us count the ways in which this film offends: Crotch-cams, awful puns, leaden karaoke and suggestive writhing in a Middle Eastern marketplace top the tasteless list." - Claudia Puig, USA Today
"As for Carrie: Sarah Jessica Parker is now 45 years old, and, frankly, I cannot stomach another moment of the simpering, mincing, hair-tossing, eyelash-batting little-girl shtick she's been pulling ever since she emerged, with considerably more verve and charm, as a high-colonic Malibu Barbie opposite Steve Martin in 'L.A. Story.'" - Ella Taylor, The Village Voice
"The women are not anywhere as desperate as the movie itself, which fails its stars and its many obsessive fans, unless everyone was waiting for the AARP version." - Betsy Sharkey, The Los Angeles Times
At this point, given the caricatures of Carrie, Charlotte, Samantha and Miranda that have only gotten more pronounced with each movie, King simply could hire drag queens for the third and no one would be any the wiser. If only.
- The Washington Post