Weird and wonderful homes

BY NICKY PARK

A living room that fits a jumping castle, an imaginary housemate and a box of condoms "to get you started" all for the low price of $NZ240 a week.

That's what's on offer in Auckland.

I was housemate hunting on TradeMe when I stumbled upon this gem located in the funky Auckland suburb of Grey Lynn.

The ad claims the bedroom is large enough for a couple, or a promiscuous single - "we'll even throw in your first box of condoms just to get you started", they write.

The living room is "even massiver" than the bedroom on offer - "it's large enough to fit a jumping castle. We know cause we did it. Twice." They provide pictures to prove it.

To snag the room in this shambolic looking three-bedder, candidates are required to sit for a tarot card reading and complete an obstacle course through the hallway - the current tenants suggest bringing "sensible shoes".

They also warn that "one of the housemates has a beard" and another is imaginary.

I keep trawling and find a house of three professional males in their late 20s looking for a female housemate.

They are asking for an "allround awesome" girl who can bring "hot friends" to their bachelor pad and "likes to cook".

Bonus points if your parents own a boat or a bar.

However, the lads admit, "if you don't fit all this criteria you can still apply". At least they're flexible.

Then there is the place that even the recent royal visitor, Prince William, can vouch for.

"I loved my visit to Auckland; especially staying at that great flat - HRH Prince William," the tenants of the Grey Lynn home write on their ad.

And they boast another reference from Playboy mogul Hugh Hefner: "I'm jealous of the decor - wish I'd done the mansion the same way, I'd probably have pulled more."

All get 10 points for creativity and while I'd love to share a glass of Kiwi's finest with them, I don't know about sharing shelter.

I touch down in Auckland for a 12-month posting with nothing but my excess baggage.

The househunt begins on the first night - checking out three places dotted around inner-city Auckland.

At the first on a steep hill in Kingsland the "house manager" offers me a falafel on arrival. Nice touch, but not sure about the compulsory family dinners every Monday and the appointment of a leader.

At the next place I'm escorted to the living room for a sitdown style interview process.

The four flatties, one of whom is an actress on the local soapie Shortland Street, proudly show me the apple tree, the cupboard that doubles as a spare room - "your friends can crash in there" - and the large, empty fishtank.

"We're filling it with bottle caps. We aim to fill it by June."

One of the 20-somethings pulls out a notepad and fires the following questions at me: "Do you like drinking? What are your thoughts on recreational drug use? Do you have a party trick?"

They seem like fun and I feel bad knocking the room back the following day but I don't think frat-house style living is for me.

I walk to my final meet-and-greet in Renall Street.

According to the ad, the five tenants of the Ponsonby crib are looking for a newbie who likes fishing.

They might not have a tank full of bottle caps and I'll have to buy my own condoms, but Renall Street had a jar of Vegemite in the cupboard.

I move in next week.

- AAP