Men like big butts...
Bumps have been big news this week.
First it was the Duchess of Cambridge's post baby, baby bump and now it's all about a bump of a different kind.
Yes, the derrière is now having a moment in the spotlight thanks to Miami Swim Fashion Week and a few blokes in the US who have decided to speak out about the growing trend in plastic surgery referred to as "gluteal sculpting".
According to a report in The New York Times, approximately 6.2 per cent of all "cosmetic buttock procedure" patients in 2012 were men, up from 2.2 per cent in the late 1990s.
Could it be the omnipresence of the tapered trouser or the fact that jeans for men have gone from dad-to-baggy-to-skinny-to-spray on styles over the years? Whatever the reason, the stats out of the States suggest men signing up for the surgery were cursed with backsides as flat as crepes since birth.
The subject of the Times article was 46-year-old, father of four Jeff Vickers, who, after a life with no butt, decided to buy one.
"When I walked in to the doctor, I said, "I'm not a girl so I'm not worried about having a table back there you could sit a coffee cup on'. I just wanted to be able to put on a pair of pants and for them to stay up," Mr Vickers said of the surgery which saw the fat from his tummy and love handles injected into his buttocks.
According to his doctor, Miami-based surgeon Constantino Mendieta, "the only way to pump up your derrière is with your wallet."
Mr Vickers was pleased with the results, as his new backside no longer sees him being the butt of "sagging" jokes. He can now also breathe easy should he ever visit Terrebonne Parish in Louisiana, as his new implants should prevent him from being slapped with a NZ $60 fine for breaking the recently introduced "baggy pants law".
In more good fashion news for men with barely there derrières, the mid to high rise, light rinse jean, could be making a comeback. The jean which was more popular than a shirtless John Stamos and featured in nearly every sitcom in the '90s, is on the cusp of making a high fashion revival.
After seasons of the painted on pants, men may now be able to relax and fish out their Jerry Seinfeld-esque jeans from the back of the wardrobe thanks to labels such as Acne and personalities including Barack Obama and Kanye West, who all champion the roomier, wider leg look.
It must be noted that both Mr President and 'Ye are in long-term relationships.
Lads, whether this look, especially when teamed with stark white footwear, yields more fashion infringement notices than phone numbers is yet to be seen.
While the dad jean may still fire up the fashion police, the trends stemming from Miami Swim Fashion Week may need police protection.
Swim Fashion Week is where swimwear designers from around the world showcase what we'll be wearing at the beach next season, and by the looks of the looks ladies, we won't just be wearing thongs on our feet.
Thanks to the cheeky collections by Californian label Minimale Animale, Bali-based Indah and Brazilian brand Poko Pano, two pieces won't just be itsy, bitsy come summertime, they will be also feature a g-string back and a super high-cut Brazilian front.
Thankfully, Aussie brand We Are Handsome, who excited editors and buyers alike at Fashion Week this year, have come to the aid of those who prefer use dental floss, not wear it.
Their upcoming The Discovery collection features photographic prints of animals and sunsets on hipster, high-waisted boy leg bottoms and bandeau tops, which will stop your cups running over thanks to detachable straps.
So for summer, don't say you haven't been warned, everyone, not just "baby", will "got back".