Pro- or anti-PDA?

Last updated 12:45 18/07/2012

Surprise! Today's post isn't written by me (Moata). Instead Chris Philpott and I have swapped blogs for the day. I'll be writing a TV-related post over at On the Box, while I've given Chris permission to "get his ranty-pants on" over here. Normal transmission returns tomorrow. 

Jessica Alba's butt gets its own public display of affectionI am not a fan of PDAs. I don't mean those little electronic diaries that were all the rage in the early 2000s (though I'm not really a fan of those either) but the other, sexier definition of PDA: Public Displays of Affection.

It seems the subject of PDAs has been following me around lately. It started last week when I caught part of an episode of The Talk in which Julie Chen and Sharon Osbourne interviewed sex therapist Laura Berman, PhD*. It continued this week when comedian/TV host Rose Matafeo tweeted "Is it horrible to be kind of weirded out when you see two homeless people make out on the street?" You're right to be weirded out, Rose - even if a street-level love story is kinda touching.

Even the Obamas are getting in on the act, spotted smooching on that most American of non-sports-related sports traditions, the Kiss Cam. You're all right, Pres, but we didn't need to see that.

Anyway, according to Berman, who is apparently well known as the author of Loving Sex: The Book of Joy & Passion, PDAs are more popular among men: 41 per cent of men surveyed admitting to enjoying PDAs, compared to just 31 per cent of women.

I have no idea where these stats came from or who was surveyed. It may have been The Talk's live studio audience. But there it is - and I, for one, am completely surprised. I mean, I don't want to reinforce stereotypes or make vast generalisations, but doesn't it seem as though it would be girls that are more interested in that kind of lovey-dovey behaviour?

Julie Chen was just as surprised as I was, and Berman explained that men enjoy PDAs more when they really love their partner and see it as a matter of pride, like a caveman marking his territory to make sure that his domain is well known.

You can count me among the 59 per cent of men who don't enjoy PDAs. I mean, I'll hold hands with my girlfriend if we're out walking, and I won't kick up a fuss about a hug or a wee peck on the cheek. But that's not really what I'm thinking of when someone says PDA: to me, it means something more than just a little kiss. If you don't know what I mean, I invite you to check out The Strand in Whangarei, where dry-humping teenagers are a regular (and always disturbing) occurrence.

I'm not a caveman marking out my territory, and I don't need to refuel my pride with public debauchery, so PDAs aren't my thing. I'm not paying rent every week so I can do private things in public. However, while it hasn't really come up in our relationship - neither of us has had the sudden urge to get it on in a public toilet or anything like that (yet) - I get the feeling my girlfriend is a little more pro-PDA than I am. To find out if I was right, I sent her a text message:

Me: "How would you react if we were in the bakery section at New World and I pressed you up against some focaccia and started pashing you?"
Her: "Hahaha. It would be on. [explicit part that I've removed]"
Me: "So you wouldn't be bothered by the sheer audacity of my public display?"
Her: "Nah. A supermarket doesn't bother me. If it were filled with kids it might."
Me: "So pashing you against the slide at Chipmunks is a no-no?"

We'll stop there - you get the idea: my girlfriend is pro-PDA, I'm not. Also, I still use the word "pash" because my kissing-related vocabulary hasn't been upgraded since fourth form. And, to be honest, this is the way I would expect it to work. In my experience, girls are more about the PDAs than the guys, and to suggest otherwise just doesn't seem logical to me.

So are you pro-PDA or anti-PDA? Do you find that men are often bigger fans of public displays of affection than women? And will you ever be able to buy focaccia bread again without thinking of this blog post?

(*) What was I doing watching The Talk, you might ask? I was flicking around while my daughter was on holiday from school. I have no excuse for watching enough to glean this much information. Also, it's not lost on me that, given the chance to guest on Blog Idle and write about anything my heart desires, I picked something I saw on TV.

You can follow Chris on Twitter or visit On The Box, if you like.

Post a comment
sarah   #1   01:08 pm Jul 18 2012

I HATE PDA's. They are disgusting. Not to mention really uncomfortable for everyone in the general vicinity of the people sucking face

JessL   #2   01:14 pm Jul 18 2012

PDA is a funny thing. I don't personally like it and sometimes when I see it happening I often wonder about the logistics. For example, a couple holding hands walking down the street on a hot day. I wonder if their hands are all sweaty and if they are making that squelchy noise when they smack together. Or the tall guy kissing a midget girl on the street - it doesn't look very good for his neck and I wonder if they stay together,will he become a hunchback.

The weird places my mind goes..

Lala   #3   01:17 pm Jul 18 2012

Pro-PDA insofar as you are Chris - anything more is a bit much!! In saying that, my partner isn't so fond of took almost a year before he'd willingly hold my hand in public where other people could see...fine to do while in transit somewhere, but when we were getting close to the people we'd be meeting, he'd drop that hand faster than american idol dropped J-Lo

MJ   #4   01:29 pm Jul 18 2012

Pash. Hehehe.

Karlos   #5   01:39 pm Jul 18 2012

I'm not against it really, unless it gets really full on like dry-humping or something!

JessL #2 - I also think about strange things like how uncomfortable it must be for the couple I see walking down the street with their arms around each other on a really hot day.

Moata   #6   01:50 pm Jul 18 2012

From now on when I see foccacia, I will be thinking "f**k-at-ya".

Damn you, Philpott! (please imagine I am saying that in the style of Jack Donaghey declaring "Good lord, Lemon!")

Leon   #7   02:08 pm Jul 18 2012

Anti PDA here. I think too many revolting teenage antics being seen really just put me off it, because I just think "oh look there's an insecure third former trying to show the world somebody likes him".

In the words of Damien Rice   #8   02:14 pm Jul 18 2012

We might kiss When we are alone When nobody's watching We might take it home We might make out When nobody's there It's not that we're scared It's just that it's delicate.

Noodle   #9   02:14 pm Jul 18 2012

I always considered PDA to be any physical sign of affection in a public place: holding hands, kissing (peck on the cheek included), hugs etc. Anything more like full-on snogging or the dry humping you describe I consider to be far past PDA. It's just plain exhibitionism and it's not something I particularly feel I need to see.

Penny   #10   02:25 pm Jul 18 2012

Yea they r a bit yuck arent they.. i must admit though I was one of these revolting dry-humping teenagers.. it makes me cringe looking back! Great to have u here chris!!

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