Bill Bailey and the awkward tweet
This is a story about the evils of Daylight Saving Time, Twitter and defiant facial hair.
As you are no doubt aware, yesterday was the first Monday after Daylight Saving Time* kicked in. This is officially the worst Monday of the year as your body, at the alarm clock's urging, fights against nature to get you to a state of wakefulness.
In my case I had made it worse by not going to bed at a reasonably (i.e. artificially early) hour the night before.
10.30pm: Not tired.
11pm: Still not tired.
12.30pm: It's after midnight? Oh crap...
Basically I got suckered by my own lack of attention and my body clock, which thought it would be cool to stay up.
Although the situation wasn't helped by the Silver Fox who must have been having some kind of awesome dream around 3.30am.
The Silver Fox: Wheeeeeeee! *pause* Ha ha ha ha.
Me (somewhat groggily): Why are you making odd noises?
The Silver Fox: Because I can!
Me: Well that's helpful.
If this exchange seems a little weird, it's important to take into account that only one of the participants was actually awake during it. Unfortunately that person was me. Taken in combination with the effect of the transition to DST, this explains why on Monday I was a bit more tired than usual.
Which in turn is why a hirsute British comedian ended up tweeting me yesterday.
I realised late in the afternoon that Bill Bailey (Manny from Black Books) was doing a show that night. I even checked to see if tickets were still available, and they were. But then when I thought about doing anything other than going home and sacking out on the couch, I just felt even more tired - which is why, just before leaving work, I sent this tweet acknowledging my own pathetic lack of energy.
And then I went home. And then the Silver Fox didn't get home until 7.45pm, leading me to believe he'd been killed in some kind of terrible accident because he didn't respond to my text messages when in fact, he hadn't changed the time on his desk clock and had his phone on silent and had no idea how late he was.
His next words after explaining what had happened were "do you want a wine?" which gives you some idea of what state of exasperation I was in by that stage.
So by 8pm, when the adorably beardy comedian in question was due to take the stage, I was not only weakened by my confused body clock but also coming down off the emotional rollercoaster of Terrible Boyfriend Death** ...and I was some way through a rather nice glass of shiraz (though I was not, perhaps, as drunk as this).
By 9.30pm another glass of wine had been drunk, an episode of The Newsroom watched, and all getting-home-late sins had been forgiven. And then, in an idle moment I checked my phone and found this.
Gasp! Bill Bailey, tweeted me. Holy crap. Yay!
Oh no! He's telling me to go to his gig which is half an hour away from being over! And even if it weren't, my tongue is completely black. I dare not go out in public lest people think I have tongue-leprosy.
Man, I suck.
And that tweet he sent me? This morning it was gone. Presumably deleted. I'm not sure what to read into that but I'm glad I still had it displayed in the Twitter app I use on my phone so I can be sure that unlike The Terrible Boyfriend Death, there is evidence that it actually happened.
So I guess if there is a moral to this story it's fourfold:
Did anybody go and see Mr Bailey last night and would you like to taunt me with descriptions of how enjoyable the show was? Is anybody else struggling with Daylight Saving Time? Should I be pleased that Bill Bailey tweeted me or ashamed?
* Please stop calling it "Daylight savings". This makes it sound like you're getting a discount on mattresses. Savings! Savings! Savings!
** Feel free to parse this however you like.