On reaching Ugly Sandal age

00:36, Nov 02 2012

There comes a moment in your life when you realise that you're just not a Hip Young Thing anymore. Actually, that's not true. There are lots of moments like that. My first one came when I realised that The Princess Bride was 20 years old. It's 25 years old now. What you actually get are a succession of these moments, and as you get older the space between them gets smaller and smaller until the noteworthy moments are those during which you feel uncharacteristically young.

At least I'm guessing that's how it works. I'll let you know when I get there.

But let's just say that this week there have been several things that have made me feel every one of my 37 years and then a few extra ones. Am an under no illusions. These are signposts on the way to "aged and irrelevant". But it's okay. I've made my peace with it. No, really. I'M FINE.

Signs that you are within cooee of buying a pair of those really ugly but (presumably) super comfortable lace-up sandals that older women seem to wear



As party season starts to spool up like the giant planet-killing laser on the Death Star, I'm struck by how much I really, truly am not a kid anymore* and that I will probably behave in a boring, moderate way far more than I used to.

When was the last time you felt like you were mere steps away from the Ugly Sandal phase of your life? Does anyone know where to buy those from?

*Anyone who has been in the same room as me when Gangnam Style is playing could be forgiven for thinking otherwise, but honestly I really am a boring old piece of baggage these days.