Are you afraid of public speaking?
I'd like to let you in on a little secret. A few people have commented and assumed, as a gay blogger on Stuff, that I'm extroverted. Well, that's only ever the case when I'm in the company of friends who know me well (or am indeed, too drunk to care). The rest of the time I'm quite shy and something I've never been great at is public speaking in front of an audience.
Beyond an Oscar speech, the thought of making speeches or presenting in front of an audience has me reaching for a brown paper bag and breaking out in a cold sweat. I don't know why this is. I don't know if I'll ever feel comfortable doing a presentation or talk but have not been as worried about taking part in a Q&A session in front of a class full of strangers. I think it might be because it's not very conversational when you're "presenting" a view rather than discussing it, so maybe that's what makes me uncomfortable depending on the format.
I definitely don't like being on stage as the centre of attention and I discovered that at the same time I knew acting wasn't for me. I played the lead role in Oliver! at the age of 10 before my voice broke and ruined my singing voice (Justin Bieber, your days are numbered!). I knew from that experience that the behind-the-scenes action was much more exciting than trying to remember lines and I still don't know how I did that. Actors amaze me with their ability to remember pages of dialogue and then act them out - it's a magical skill.
Not only am I less than keen on making presentations or speeches, I also don't like to appear on camera very often or hear the sound of my voice recorded. Nobody was more surprised than I when I did a radio interview and actually didn't cringe the whole time I was listening to it. The interview was with Kapiti Access Radio about filmmaking, my life and the blog and it aired on Sunday afternoon at 3pm but can be heard on-demand here.
Generally, when I'm talking to people one-on-one I feel much more confident than talking at people for a period of time and wondering the whole time if what I'm saying is interesting and what everyone is thinking of it. I feel much better having a more conversational interaction and I think that helped to make doing radio interviews that much better because the only thing I had to worry about was how to answer the questions.
This often means I don't like the sorts of job roles that entail doing presentations and talking to a wider group of people, but it doesn't mean I'll sit there in a meeting and say nothing if I have an opinion. I generally feel confident enough to contribute my opinion to a group of people in a meeting, but not in a large seminar - if there are more than 12 people in the room and/or I don't know all of them, then I'm in trouble!
Do you have difficulty with public speaking and presentations or does it come easily to you? Have you ever heard your own voice recorded or seen yourself on camera - did you find it okay or was it weird?
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I failed a diploma about 8 years ago after being the top of my class all because I couldn't bring myself to do the presentation part :( I think if I had a go now I would be alright but back then it was terrifying! I completely regret not completing it but at least I know I can give it a go when I'm ready!
You have such a cute voice.
I don't mind getting up and presenting so long as I'm fairly comfortable with what it is I need to say. I loved those go off and do 15 mins of reading/research then come back and present what you have learned type activities. I don't get the chance to do that sort of thing since having children but will again someday.
Awh Chaz!
I know what you mean, I don't get paper bag nervous but I do get a bit jittery and I will fidget the whole time I am speaking. The last presentation I did was for work, The slides and notes look damned good but when it came to delivering it to a crowd of angry strangers it went less than smoothly especially after I was interrupted.
I was anticipating about 30 people and that some of them might even leave as I was going last in the list of speakers.. of course what really happened is that I turned up to a big room with my bosses at Sky City and it was packed wall to wall with angry people who thought that they were getting stiffed by the council (who I don't work for) so after a retraction from banksie's right hand man they remained angry and that eventually was focused on me... I got through it though. Trial by fire.
I don't think I could ever be a stage actor but cameras don't bother me all that much... I don't think I would be that great on tv.
I wish I understood why this was such a huge problem. Public speaking for me has always been a fun challenge. The whole world isn't against you. If someone's watching you speak, chances are they're interested. If they're not, then as long as they don't interrupt you, who cares? A seminar or speech is a really good way to present research, because by summarising it, it helps you to focus on the key points and really see the benefit of your work.
Having said that, I still get nervous before a speech or presentation. But since I'm a musician and I have to perform all the time, I've developed my own techniques for dealing with nerves. I believe anyone can overcome their fear of public speaking with a couple of good experiences and practice.
I feel ok during the lead-up, but about half an hour before I have to present/talk, I'll start sweating, my heart starts racing and I get a very becoming flushy rash thing on my chest. The fear is so irrational, and I try my hardest to convince myself that I'm being ridiculous, but the physical fear seems to overtake the mental fear every time. I get a similar reaction if I'm put on the spot in a conversation with more than one or two people. Crazy!
I've always been terrified of public speaking, and tended to stutter and freeze up when the opportunity came.
I joined my local Toastmasters club about a year ago though, and since then I've gained a huge amount of confidence! I'm now quite confident getting up in front of a crowd, and I've gained a whole lot more confidence in one-on-one conversation with strangers in my job too.
If you want to learn confidence in public speaking, you absolutely must find a Toastmasters club, it's magic!
Lol, get outta my head! - I feel the same way. Public speaking freaks me out! small groups are fine but any larger and I fall over my words, break out in sweats and end up looking like a moron. I'm currently looking becoming a chairperson for a committee, and I know that is going to involve a speech in front of thousands of people next year, and that is something that is making me really nervous about it standing.
Have you thought about doing a toastmasters course thing? that was suggested to me recently, so I am going to check that out and see if that could help at all.
The only time I don't like my own voice is if I have had a few to many and I start to slur, that is a cautionary tale to never let your friends record you while intoxicated.
You can overcome it if you want to!
At high school and university I was absolutely petrified of speaking in front of people. I felt exactly like you describe. Then I decided this was something that was going to stop me progressing in my career and decided to do something about it. I started volunteering to do presentations and practiced. I still get a bit nervey and shaky beforehand, but I'm not afraid anymore.
I'm one of those horrible people who enjoy public speaking. But if I had to sing in public, I'd probably vomit.
The great thing about community access radio stations (go Kapiti!) is they teach people how easy and unintimidating public speaking can be- they deserve a big shout out for giving a wide range of people more confidence communicating.
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I'm exactly the same. Even the thought of having to speak publicly makes me ill. When I was at uni I had a class where part of the semester's mark was for an oral presentation. I couldn't do it. Skipped class that week and made up some excuse. I got a C when I could have gotten an A. Apparently fear of public speaking is #1 on the list of all time biggest phobias.