The week's best & worst dressed
THE BAD: Of course Bar Refaeli somehow makes this 60s lace abomination look almost cool ... but if it's just okay on her, then it's a fashion fail: can you imagine normal people in that weirdly-long lace Tshirt? I'd look like a badly-stuffed, moldy sausage in that ensemble. But the thing that ultimately lands this Michael Kors look in the 'bad' basket is the intentionally frayed hem on the bottom of the trousers that makes it look like the Israeli supe' is rocking a fur trim.
THE BAD: Oh wow, since when did Linda Evangelista and Priscilla Presley become the same person? Also, this D&G dress looks like a tissue box cover. A really fancy, grandma's best tissue box cover, but still ... Ooh, and HOW does she get her brows like that? That's some gravity-defying arch.
THE BAD: Normally I'd wholeheartedly encourage the removal of a Cookie Monster jacket, but not here. I vaguely remember a 'trend' of tissue paper fashion shows when I was in primary school ... and Eliza Doolittle's 'outfit' looks a lot like what an eight-year-old me would've managed to fashion out of nothing but some Cottonelle (I'd use the extremely embossed peach stuff for that skirt panel).
THE BAD: I don't know who Janina Korn is; I don't know why she's got her hand inside her skirt and I don't know why she's wearing shoes the colour of poo. I do know that I'm upset by it.
THE MEH: I'm digging Jessie J's fresh face, but do think this Camilla and Marc dress makes it look like she's had some kind of emergency and so has had to wrap a bin bag around her shoulders to protect her modesty... just. Thoughts?
THE BAD: If George RR Martin had written 50 Shades Of Grey then Bonnie Anderson's outfit would make a perf' costume for the film. I can see no other reason for a dress like this to exist.
THE I JUST DON'T KNOW: I've now stared at this for a touch longer than my bosses would be happy about and still can't figure out if I like it or not. Surprisingly, I think the cape in this Naeem Khan Fall 2013 look is probably the best element ... but the seam down the middle of that velvet dress is not working. Plus, when I see <a href="http://www.vanityfair.com/online/oscars/2013/12/john-mayer-katy-perry-who-you-love-artwork.sl.7.john-mayer-katy-perry-who-you-love-album-cover.jpg" target="_blank">photos like this</a> I realise just how beautiful Katy Perry is, and just how much of injustice her four-layers of foundation; deep smokey eye and bold lip makeup-style is.
THE GOOD: Gorgeous hair, a bold lip (with natural eyes - please refer to this Katy Perry's makeup artist), a beautiful blush pink Zac Posen dress with a sultry fit: kudos to Amanda Seyfried.
THE BEST: Bollywood star Deepika Padukone is owning this Gauri & Nainika dress. Not many people can pull off mustard, but she certainly does. Simplicity is sometimes the pinnacle of elegance.
THE GOOD: Keira Knightley is so awesome. Why? Because this lovely 2006 Chanel couture dress is the same one she wore to the 2008 Baftas party and the same dress she wore to her own wedding in France in May this year, she just added some collar detailing with a mesh overlay. It's so cool because, let's be honest, if any of us owned couture Chanel we'd be getting that thing out at any possible opportunity. Am also muchly-loving her musician hubbie James Righton's classic tux: it's refreshing to see an indie musician not wearing thousand dollar clothes yet still somehow looking homeless.
THE GOOD: The grey-blue of this Sophie Theallet dress is definitely underused, and Victoria's Secret model Lindsay Ellingson is rocking it. The look is topped off with a gorgeous darker-silk hem and the perfect simple hair do (Lindsay has a tendency to over-curl on the red carpet, and I'm so glad she didn't go all Honey Boo Boo on us here).
THE GOOD: A) I'm liking the fact Naomi Campbell is wearing colour. It suits her, and she normally sticks to black and white. B) Next time I wear a dress to an occassion I must make sure to take the dress' designer to the event so they can 'juje' me throughout the night. 'I NEED MORE AIR IN MY TRAIN ZAC!'
THE GOOD: Rocking a yellow Dior spaghetti-strap dress at 53; Patricia Clarkson how much I love thee.
This week simple elegance from Deepika Padukone, Keira Knightley and more win the race while dominatrix- and toilet paper-chic lose it.
In this week's gallery of the best and worst red carpet fashion from the past seven days, we haven't included looks from the style smorgasbord that was the British Fashion Awards, as
we're all over those here.