Best & worst dressed: Grammy parties
THE BAD: When I was eight and couldn't decide who I loved, Ariel or Cinderella, this Armani number would have been my dream dress, as it's pretty much a hybrid of the two Disney princesses' personal style. NO Katy NO. You're so dang beautiful, why do you always over-fuss an outfit? First things first, liberate your hair a little, it's so over-styled it doesn't even look like it belongs to a human. And secondly, put on a dress that doesn't look like it was crafted from Spotlight's off-cuts discount bucket of flammable materials.
THE GOOD: Kate Beckinsale's usually one for floor-length gowns but GIRL, get your legs out more, as you look pretty dang fierce in this Rubin Singer mini. I'm not a huge fan of the bustle from the back, but then it adds a lovely bit of texture to the outfit's front profile. Her hubby Len's outfit is fine, but, let's be honest, not worthy of comment.
THE BAD: Okay, nice things first: Ashanti's hair looks lovely. Now for the truth - this Dar Sara dress is a mess. Firstly, it's basically a bathing suit. Secondly, that industrial-looking silver taping down the side is possibly the worst design decision ever made. 'Yah ... I just wanted ladies to look really messy and wide around the pelvis to really frame the tiny cherubs trapped in their bellies.'
THE GOOD: It's hard to see well in these pictures, but Chrissy Teigen's Alon Livne dress is actually a very successful take on the see-through trend (because let's be ernesto, we've seen a lot of sheer fails on the red carpet). Here's a clearer snap. Also, John Looks lovely in his Gucci tuxedo ... and Katy Perry just looks worse when next to people dressed like adults.
THE NEEDS-TO-LISTEN-TO-COCO-CHANEL: Jetta has a killer voice (she reminds me a lot of Adele but even more husky) Here, have a listen. But, while I actually dig her overall aesthetic here in a muso' kind of way (especially her purple lip), sister needs to just remove a few elements. I'd start with about five necklaces. Oh, and she needs to burn those crushed velvet garter tights and just build a bridge immediately and move on.
THE I'M-JUST-NOT-SURE: On the one hand I give Kat Graham points just for wearing a suit - it's a refreshing change - and the colour of this Anthony Franco tailoring is gorgeous. But then, I think it's also that sheeny hue that puts this firm on the precipice of 'D-grade-small-bookings-only-Elvis-impersonator'.
THE GREAT: I can find nothing to fault here. I love Mary Lambert's old-Hollywood-glam hair and makeup and that red sparkly dress is just delightful - and a beautiful, under-used shade of red. Win.
THE 'ARE-THE-CAPES-NECESSARY?': I dig the colours of Natasha Bedingfeld and Holland Roden's dress ... but ... the mushroom imprisoning Natasha's upper-half ruin the Christian Siriano dress for me, and while I prefer the cape on Holland's Basler dress I still don't love it.
THE MODELS: Nicole Trunfio looks like Chewbacca as interpreted by the people that put on Lorde's stage shows ... while Constance Jablonski looks perfectly lovely in Proenza Schouler (although the length is a little off).
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Here we have the fashion highs and red carpet nos at the Grammy Awards after-parties.
Oh Katy Perry, what are you doing? The best and worst looks from the rest of the Grammy weekend - and there were some shockers - will be in regular our fashion wrap on Friday.
Who was your best dressed of the week?