THE GREAT: Yay, another navy! I love the fountain of material created by the draping on this Alexander McQueen gown and it's nice to see Sandra Bullock rocking some curls for a change too. Win.
THE FINE: I feel like this Elie Saab dress would have been a really good outfit choice for nominee June Squibb; but it's just a bit ageing on Ange Jolie. Obviously she looks beautiful - as she is so beautiful - but I wish she'd worn emerald green and less mesh. Brad: tux, great; hair, fail.
THE GREAT: She's somehow making marching band shoulders look great and Kate Hudson deserves a slow clap for that. This Atelier Versace gown is just-different-enough; sexy yet still strong and VERY her.
THE WEIRD: It's like Lady Gaga is on SNL and is impersonating Kristin Chenoweth - I have no other explanation for the overcooked hair and makeup accompanying this actually-not-ugly Versace gown.
THE FINE: Is the mosquito net wrapped around her arm really necessary - I mean maybe LA's riddled with mossies at the mo', who knows. If not, I think Penelope Cruz's Giambattista Valli gown would be improved greatly by the lack of it.
THE GOOD (BUT COULD BE BETTER): I love the tomato red colour of Jennifer Lawrence's Dior gown; but I'm not a huge fan of the hip curtains and the backward Neil Lane necklace. And does girlfriend have no eyebrows?! Ooh and can we have one event at which she doesn't wear strapless already?
THE GREAT: Cate Blanchett's Giorgio Armani gown has divided the office. Some people say 'it looks like she's got reverse mumps'; others say 'meh, seen it before' but I just love it. The sheer high neck is so elegant and I think the embroidery (even the nipple tassle areas) is just beautiful.
THE MEH: It's like Julia Roberts had some suitcase issues and so ended up having to wear Maggie Smith's red carpet dress (and just chopped the arms off). I'm liking her newly blonde hair but just can't get past the fact that this floppy-peplum dress just doesn't fit her.
THE GREAT: We were all waiting to see what she'd wear and so perhaps I was suffering from some anticipation-elevation-of-expectations as I was hoping for a truly bright colour, but the more I look at this custom-made Prada on Lupita Nyong'o the more I love it. That ice blue - which she calls Nairobi blue - is stunning, and the dress suits her physique perfectly. I'd just have ditched the headband.
THE I'M NOT SURE: While on one hand she just looks amazing because she's amazing, I do find the 'invisibra' straps on Charlize Theron's Dior dress perplexing. The bottom of the dress is just beautiful, but the straps remind me of those awful you-think-we-can't-see-them-but-we-can-see-them plastic bra straps girls used to wear with bandeaus before the design of strapless bras advanced so they were no longer torture instruments.
THE GREAT: Yay, some more colour! The peach hue of this Versace dress is officially Jada Pinkett Smith's colour (and I love how she's picked a perfectly complementary shade of eyeshadow). Will Smith's lounge look is perfectly fine although I am confused by his half-leather/half-suede shoes.
THE GREAT: I love this two-piece look on Meryl Streep, mostly because of the awesome chunky jewels and the draping on the neckline of her cream top.
THE MEH: Camila Alves is so beautiful, and I love this blush pink on her, but I think she's fallen victim to about 20 metres too much material in this Gabriela Cadena gown. Matt McC is rocking his D&G tux (and slightly Just Men darker hair?) though.
THE GREAT: I am aware that I'm basically endorsing satin bedsheets held together with a giant tie pin but I can't help it, I love this maternity look on Kerry Washington. The colour of the Jason Wu gown is just beautiful and I'm digging her berry lip.
THE BAD: This isn't bad-bad-bad, but considering it's the worst shimmery neutral dress of the night (which seems to be pretty much all we've had) it chalks up as a bad. I can't decide if I dislike the boxy top half of Jennifer Garner's Oscar De La Renta dress or its lampshade bottom-half more. Thoughts?
THE GOOD: This is another divisive one but I actually love Emma Watson's lurex singlet-shaped Vera Wang. It's like her final boot goodbye to Her-mey-one.
THE GREAT: We really are swimming in neutral shimmery nudes - snooze - but Jessica Biel's is probably the best we've seen so far. This Chanel gown is so simple, as is her hair and makeup, and yet it's all so achingly elegant. Win.
THE GOOD: Yes, Jenna Dewan Tatum's Reem Acra dress is beautiful ... but I can't help but think of it as a less interesting version of Cate Blanchett's gown. Next year can we have a ban on nude?
THE GOOD: Naomi Watts rocks ice white Calvin Klein - and while I do like it, looking at it closely it reminds me of the crusty ice that has slowly formed at the back of my freezer.
THE GOOD: Chrissy Teigen's Monique Lhuillier gown has pockets. I feel that's all I need to say.
THE GOOD: Navy is an underrated colour (you know, many of us don't 'suit' black, but if you're one of them you can probably pull off navy) and I love this simple-yet-structured Gucci Couture gown on Amy Adams. It's a classic that will never go out of style (although I'm not a fan of her just-taken-off-a-hairband-she's-worn-all-day hair).
THE BAD: I want to love this because I love Anna Kendrick, but this J Mendel gown with stunted Jolie leg is just bad. The neckline's making me all choky, the red detail looks like a cheap kitchen splashback and, yes, then there's the poor imitation of Jolie leg. No.
THE GOOD: Julie Delpy looks old world glam in Jenny Packham. How does she make something so dazzling look so effortless? Love it.
THE GOOD: She's like an art deco Oscar come to life and I love it. Kristin Chenoweth is such a babe and this gold Cavalli gown works wonderfully on her.
THE GOOD: I officially dislike that hair (you just know it would be full-on stiff to the touch) but one can't deny that Kristen Bell's Cavalli gown is gorgeous - although it's a touch bridal, and, at a push I prefer Krissy Chen's.
THE GREAT: Wow, maternity suits Olivia Wilde's style. I love this Valentino gown - it's very Julia Roberts 2001 Oscars win - which is kept interesting with a keyhole back and a flash of white material. Also, her eye makeup is making me want to get my spoon out to try and perfect cat-eye-liner again (when I try to do it sans spoon it looks like I've been attacked by a vivid).
THE GOOD: While I do find her increasingly startled 'brows concerning, Portia De Rossi's Naeem Khan dress is just gorgeous - I love the Moorish patterns of the skirt and think the whole look is just 'fashion' enough.
THE GREAT: I'm not the biggest fan of the matching cuffs - they look a bit utility - but this emerald Escada gown makes Viola Davis look truly radiant. Also loving her fingerwaves.
THE GOOD DRESS BAD HAIR: I do usually enjoy Kelly Osbourne's purple hair (mostly because she's just stuck with it for so long) but you think you'd touch up your roots for the Oscars, amirite? PS: Her Badgley Mischka dress is made by that ornate cape (and her shoes are by high street brand Aldo, which is cool).
THE BAD: There's good lace (Valentino) and then there's bad lace (mothball-odour kitchen curtains with pasta sauce stains splattered across them) - Ireland Baldwin's Burberry dress unfortunately falls into the latter category.
THE GOOD: Louise Roe is a stylist to the stars so you would hope she could dress herself for the red carpet, and she can. This Pronovias sari-inspired gown is simple and yet stunning.
THE FINE: I'm not a huge fan of dresses that froth out from the waist with such intensity, but Giuliana Rancic does look perfectly lovely in this cappuccino gown by Australian designer Paolo Sebastian.
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