SAVCHENKO FROM GERMANY: Highlights here include suggestive sequin work, a neon pink scrunchie and tights that creepily swallow feet.
THE NORWEGIAN CURLING TEAM: Stop the games folks, these guys have officially won based on jaunty pants choice alone.
THE RUSSIAN CURLING TEAM: Meanwhile, Team Russia look like staff at Club Med Bali. AND ... Matching socks. Brilliance.
PLYUSCHENKO OF RUSSIA; JOUBERT OF FRANCE & GODOROZHA OF UKRAINE: Mesh was the order of the day for the men on ice - embellished with everything from tiny rash-like love hearts to lightning bolts and duct tape. The only other accessories required? Dodgy bangs and buckets of attitude (although the Russian is falling a bit behind on the latter).
MACHIDA OF JAPAN: Scrap that, they should have all accessorised with feathers. Yes plumage + sparkles + see-through armpit mesh definitely ups an outfit's game.
GE OF UZBEKISTAN & ROMANENKOV OF ESTONIA: When wearing mesh it is also essential to at one point in the routine pull at it in a moment of pure on-ice passion. Powerful.
RAKIMGALIEV OF KAZAKHSTAN: Turning a too-big suspender issue *must-remember-to-fire-stylist-post-routine* into a piece of ice gliding magic. What a pro.
REYNOLDS OF CANADA: Meanwhile, Canada seems to have forgotten this poor lad's costume and crafted a makeshift one from clothes stolen from Tara Reid's lost luggage and Bieber's 'pretending-to-be-King-Jofrey-dress-up-drawer'.
TEAM AMERICA: Ralph Lauren, it's time to retire.
A RUSSIAN FAN: A for effort, F for empathy towards the spectators behind you.
TEAM GERMANY: The poor German athletes were forced to repurpose pool lilos and Team China's tablecloths from four years ago. Budgets are tight.