'I'm not a killer' says Matamata trainer

BY JONATHAN MARSHALL

The prominent horse-breeder accused of shooting dead his wife at their Matamata home says he is "not a killer" and that he "never wanted to see her dead".

Greg Howard Meads, 54, was imprisoned in September after detectives charged him with murdering Helen Meads, 42. But last week he was at his parents' Bay of Plenty home, where he was bailed on December 17.

The decision of an Auckland High Court judge to bail Meads just before Christmas went against Crown wishes and has angered friends of the family of the deceased.

Police claim Meads used a shotgun to kill his wife following a dispute on September 23 at the couple's semi-rural Waikato property.

Helen Meads, district commissioner of the Matamata Pony Club, was discovered with a single shot wound to her stomach.

The couple had been married for 10 years, but had split up shortly before the tragedy. Helen Meads had reportedly begun moving out of the marital home, along with the couple's eight-year-old daughter, Samantha.

Yesterday, from his parents' lakeside home in Te Puna, Meads spoke for the first time about the day his wife died. Clearly emotional, he was in tears at several points during the interview.

"I am a 54-year-old man and have never been in trouble with the law before. A terrible tragedy happened and if I had one wish in the world it would be to turn the clock back," Meads told the Star-Times.

"I am not a killer. I never wanted to see her dead. That was never supposed to happen. It never was.

"All I want is for life to go back to how it was. I'm sure you can work out that life for me will never be the same."

Meads said his time behind bars was indescribable. "I have been in solitary confinement, away from everyone the whole time. Shut off. At first I wanted to take my life."

One of the several bail conditions Meads is subject to means he cannot contact his daughter Samantha.

"That is the most heartbreaking thing. From inside prison I was allowed to write to her but now I'm out I can't, otherwise I will be breaching my bail."

Meads pointed to a room containing Christmas presents intended for Samantha, then broke down before saying: "I can't give them to her. God, I can't tell you what that feels like."

Meads said the reason he had decided against taking his life was because of his children. "That's the driving force to give myself a target to aim for... the target is to be a father."

Helen Meads is also survived by a 17-year-old daughter and a 20-year-old son from a previous relationship.

Meads refused to discuss the "domestic incident" that preceded his wife's death.

When asked if he shot his wife, as police allege, Meads put his head into his hands and cried, before saying: "I am not up to talking about this at the moment, I have said enough; probably I have said too much. You must go."

Phil Stevens, a trainer who knew Helen Meads for more than 10 years, said the decision to grant bail was ludicrous and demonstrated a lack of respect.

"Everybody is shocked by this. It is so hard on the family of Helen – this is their first Christmas without her. That includes her children, and here he is gallivanting around the show," Stevens said.

He was certain Meads would not attend yesterday's Boxing Day races at Ellerslie Racecourse in Auckland.

"I can't imagine he would have shown his face there; he is not very well liked in the racing business."

Meads' strict bail conditions state he must reside at his parents' home each night between 8pm and 8am. He was also forced to hand over his passport.

He is forbidden from travelling to Matamata and must report to Tauranga police station each Monday and Friday. He is not allowed to have any contact with his daughter Samantha and must not go within 30km of the Matamata Post Office. He is allowed to visit an address in Matamata for "business purposes" for a maximum two-hour period, but not before seeking police permission.

"I never realised how strict the bail conditions would be," Meads said.

One of Meads' best-performing horses in recent years, Ginga Dude, raced at Ellerslie yesterday, but was unplaced. Meads sold the horse in the days before his wife's alleged murder.

Meads said the world of horse racing no longer interested him.

"I don't want anything more to do with it."

It is likely that unless he breaks conditions Meads will remain on bail until his trial. His next scheduled appearance is at Hamilton High Court on February 19.

- © Fairfax NZ News