As camp as a row of fancy coffee grinders

BOB IRVINE - © Fairfax NZ News

"Be natural, be happy, be real, be relaxed, be yourself." Even my cereal box was on holiday. "Here at (name withheld), we passionately believe that simple ingredients are the best."

Man's earthly treasures

BOB IRVINE - © Fairfax NZ News

The little writing bureau in the op-shop received careful scrutiny. The price was reasonable, and it looked like an easy do-up, but the prospective buyer shook her head. "It's more stuff," she said wistfully. "When you reach a certain age you don't need more stuff."

Bums on seats, and knees

BOB IRVINE - © Fairfax NZ News

The young woman eyed me up. She was one of those dusky maidens who induced early European sailors to mutiny in the South Seas. I'm not sure what "dusky" means, but it was a fashionable look among maidens of the time.

A grand plan for an island crying out for a submarine

BOB IRVINE - © Fairfax NZ News

The Nelson Sculpture Trust is promising to revive its proposal for a huge artwork on Haulashore Island. In September, trust director Rebecca Hamid drummed up publicity for a jewellery exhibition in a shed on Wakefield Quay, overlooking Haulashore. She said she hoped the location would stimulate "informed debate" about the planned $2.5 million sculpture, setting the scene for a public meeting in early November.