Beware the legal perils of chocolate: it's the gift that will bite back at you

OPINION: By the time you read this Christmas will be over and you will either be fighting with your spouse about how best to cook chicken on the BBQ, writes Mary-Jane Thomas in this week's Work to Rule.

... wondering if you have a drinking problem when you contemplate having one at 11am, or working out how to get back at your sister for giving the kids the toy police cars that have the "woohooo" sound and then the disembodied voice that says "slow down, pull over" over and over and over.

Throughout the year I see some really stupid things come through but this had me laughing (albeit hysterically) about how simple things can be made by lawyers to appear so, so difficult.

An English lawyer has warned about possible court cases arising out of "secret Santa gifts".

In England (as in New Zealand) it is not appropriate to give gifts that could be classified as offensive. The lawyer says however "as an example don't give religious colleagues alcohol or offensive magazines" most of all "don't give female workers kitchenware."

On the basis of this advice I have no doubt offended my employees for the last 5 years therefore I have added my own list of don'ts.

Do not give fat employees chocolate, this may be taken as mocking them.

Do not give skinny employees chocolate it may be interpreted as inferring they have anorexia and need "a good feed".

Do not give middle-sized employees chocolate as this may be seen as an effort to make them fat.

Do not give the boss chocolate, this may be seen as an effort to influence them in the future and if you do get a promotion then this may be challenged by some fellow employee on the basis of discrimination.

For goodness sake do not give your subordinates chocolate, this may be seen as supporting an inference you have treated them badly during the year and have tried to make up for it by giving chocolate.

Such an action may be used as evidence supporting a personal grievance for bullying.

Bring on the New Year!

» Mary-Jane Thomas is a partner at Preston Russell Law. E-mail questions to mary-jane.thomas@prlaw.co.nz.

- © Fairfax NZ News

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