Dye hard dad

OPINION: As a dad there's a fine line between trying to please and just being a try hard, writes Gerry Forde in this week's Southlander.

"Will I get out of bed on a frosty night to pick you up at 1.30am? Sure my dear ... and I can take your mates home, too."

Immediately, the big smile and the arms around. "Thanks Daddy!"

But how far does a man go?

"Dad, I need to dye your hair for hairdressing class."

Years of neglecting my appearance made me hesitate.

"It'll only get rid of the gray hairs and you'll have your natural colour. Unless you want pink streaks?"

"No! Just the brown dye!"

"Thanks Daddy!"

So my hair, which gets two strokes of the brush before work, was suddenly conditioned, massaged and glugged with dye.

At the end I looked in the mirror but someone was walking past ... no wait, that is me, the new me!

I tried to slip quietly into work past reception.

"Nice hat Gerry."

Upstairs in the open plan office there was nowhere to hide.

"That's taken 10 years off you Gerry you don't look a day over 50!"

But in behind the good-natured hair pulling I overheard: "It really brings out the colour of his eyes."

I started to feel good about the new hair. But the real test came at home.

The Good Woman was crossing the room when she stopped dead.

She stared.

"It's very dark."

"Shall I turn a light on?"

"Your hair!" Typical bloke, I'd actually forgotten about it.

"No, it's not your natural colour at all. I don't like it."

I've made a study of reading between the lines of communication but those two lines were that clear and tight you couldn't even squeeze in a grey hair let alone a grey area.

That Sunday the Good Woman suddenly decided we should go out for a meal.

Even more surprising she walked out of two quiet restaurants in favour of one brimming with customers.

Then it hit me she wanted to be seen with the young-looking dude.

I went to say something but stopped.

There could be a lot more nights out for this dye hard dad.

» Gerry Forde is the Venture Southland regional identity brand manager.

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