OPINION: At way over NZ$100 per second, the hottest ticket in town will burn a considerable hole in your pocket. Never mind, they could have charged five times as much and still sold out the stadium. The whole of London wants a ticket for the Olympic 100 metres final.
No-one cares that the closest a Brit will get to the event is firing the starting gun and even that job is likely to be farmed out. The world wants to see the show. Already Ato Boldon, the four-time Olympic sprint medallist, is predicting "the best race ever".
At the weekend, Yohan Blake, the youngest ever 100m world champion, ran 9.75 seconds to beat Usain Bolt in the Jamaican trial. A few days earlier Justin Gatlin had clocked 9.80 to beat Tyson Gay in the American final eliminator. Then there's a guy from Trinidad called Keston Bledman, who has run 9.86.
After his victory, Gatlin said: "I have heard a lot of words this season. `Redemption'. `My journey'."
How about cheat? Lest we forget, Gatlin was banned for taking drugs two years after he became the 2004 Olympic champion. At the time Gatlin blamed a masseuse with a grudge for rubbing his legs with an illegal steroidal cream.
Or had he too much testosterone in the system after a vigorous workout with his wife who "deserved a treat" on her birthday? No sorry, that was Dennis Mitchell. Oh, and Marion Jones claimed that she had taken flaxseed oil and then admitted to lying because "I didn't love myself enough."
Four years ago I was fortunate enough to be in the Bird's Nest Stadium in Beijing watching in disbelief as Lightning Bolt blew out the world record, easing up at the line with his shoelaces undone. It was one of the most beautiful sporting sights I have ever seen, but it was also impossible to shake the feeling of disbelief.
The 100m has become a religious experience, an article of faith. The title "the fastest human being on the planet" is perhaps the nearest thing to a universal god. My problem is that I am a sporting atheist. If something looks too good to be true, it usually is.
This is the credo that the Beijing Olympics demanded of the true track and field believer: Usain Bolt has never taken drugs despite shattering the world record, despite Jamaica's shabby drug-testing programme, despite being dusted as a junior, despite the fact that over the previous 20 years Donovan Bailey was the only Olympic champion not to have a proven association with drugs, despite an island of under three million winning seven of the 12 sprint medals at the Games.
Since that time four years ago our faith has been even more severely tested. One Jamaican has been kicked out of the sport after being caught for drugs a second time. And the number of elite athletes who have faced charges runs into double figures.
That group includes Blake, Bolt's training partner, world champion and the man who broke the stadium record the other day.
AS FAR as I can work out, Blake tested positive for a stimulant, was cleared by Jamaica's committee because the stimulant wasn't on Wada's list, the committee then appealed their own decision and banned Blake for three months. Wacky.
I am not a biochemist, but the sceptical conclusion might be that if you slightly alter the chemical properties of a drug and then give it a different name, there's a good chance of getting off because it won't be on Wada's list.
During the same period Shelly-Ann Fraser-Pryce, Jamaica's world and Olympic women's champion, also tested positive but only received a six-month ban because it was toothache medicine what did her in.
Even Bolt has admitted to the odd spliff when growing up. He told Bild magazine: "When you're a child in Jamaica you learn how to roll a joint." This was followed by a hurried public statement: "I would like to urge the forthcoming stars to stay away from any kind of drugs as it is not of any value to them or the sport they participate in."
Who wrote that? It wasn't Usain Bolt. I have sat in on the odd press conference and Bolt doesn't speak like that. He is way too cool.
And that's my problem. I really want to believe in God. I really want to think that Bolt is not like all those phoney snakeoil salesmen who went before, because the big Jamaican runs so very beautifully. But I also don't want to be made a fool of. Again.
Gay said: "I understand that scepticism comes with the territory because past champions tested positive for drugs.
"The Olympic champion has to be clean and then has to prove it."
Ah, but he can't. Bolt cannot prove the existence of God because he cannot prove that he hasn't taken drugs.
In a sporting sense, there is reasonable doubt. Does that diminish our enjoyment of the Olympic 100m? Hell no. It's still the hottest ticket in time. We are a superstitious people. We all still need something to believe in.
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