Peoples Choice 2010: Good Grief

By Kathy Dyson

Unwrapping the gifts

Look after us this night till the dawn
With this body I thee worship

-Do not muddle up the cards and presents. People are so kind, thoughtful, so generous.
The satin clad bride and the taffeta bridesmaids begin to unwrap.
Two pop up toasters, One pair Mosgeil blankets, One dinner set, Seven brocade tablecloths, a pink vase, a blue cake plate, seven casseroles, ironing board, three irons, a set of saucepans, six dessert spoons, twelve knives, three tablespoons and a box of teaspoons.

-This lot looks like hard work. No fun. Do we have to thank people for this junk?
-No, I do. With humble gratitude and neat handwriting, I’ve had cards printed and bought little silver boxes for pieces of cake.
The bride sighs.

The three sisters step back and admire the way they have arranged gifts and cards and hidden the paper under the table. One last parcel three foot high, wrapped in tasteful silver horseshoe paper and as heavy as a dead calf behind the cowshed on a winter’s morning. The bride and bridesmaid approach the parcel. Six hands carefully remove the paper and fold it to the feet of the object. The three of them stare wide-eyed
 - Who’s it from?