Unreported

a lighthearted look at the week

Last updated 07:11 25/01/2013

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3D films overrated

Being over 30 years old, the small team at Unreported knows all about challenges technology can pose, so can identify with the experience of a Daily News receptionist at a 3D movie recently. Being the first multi- dimensional film she had attended, she was thoroughly excited and gleefully put her special glasses on. But once she started watching she decided all the hype around the format was utter tripe. Nothing jumped out at her, everything was fuzzy and the whole film had been shot in the shade. That's generally what a 3D film looks like when you're wearing your sunglasses.

Missing: Teddy in dress

In other staff news, the 4-year-old daughter of one of our employees contacted Unreported on Monday in serious distress. "I've lost my teddy," she said. Coming as we do from the school of semi-hard middle-class knocks we were just about to detail how life frequently disappoints when she happened to mention two adorable facts. First its name was John Harold and secondly it played Jingle Bells when you wound the tail. "We'll find your teddy," we said. By which we didn't mean "us", but you. So if anyone has seen a teddy bear in an orange dress in or around either Fitzroy, East End or Back Beach, well, you know what to do.

Clinging to past

The opposite of losing is winning and everyone knows it was the All Blacks who won the 2011 Rugby World Cup. It was a magnificent moment never to be forgotten. Which is probably why the New Plymouth District Council hasn't removed the world cup signage on its downtown carpark, or the blue line leading to the stadium. We're not saying they should get rid of it just because it's getting a bit shabby and makes the city seem like it's clinging desperately to past glories it can never regain but, oh, hold on. No, that's exactly what we're saying.

'Busy' workers

A recent request by a reporter put into a government department in Wellington took a mind-bending turn when he received an email replyabout answering his question. "Which they didn't do," he said. "But they did tell me that I would have to wait a bit longer before they had an answer on how much longer I would have to wait." It confused him as much as us. But apparently it's fairly standard bureaucratic-speak and is often translated to "you're disturbing our lunch break".

@Sportzfreak: If you're that aggrieved by Morgan's comments then the appropriate protest is to smuggle a cat into the stadium and set it free.

Unreported@dailynews.co.nz Twitter: @Unreportable

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