Silent sadness without Emma

KIRK HARGREAVES/The Press

IN MEMORY: Henry and Louise Agnew's Christmas will celebrate daughter Emma.

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Christmas was such a special time for deaf Emma Agnew that her bereft family is struggling to contemplate the day without her.Christmas was such a special time for deaf Emma Agnew that her bereft family is struggling to contemplate the day without her.

Parents Henry and Louise Agnew spoke publicly for the first time this week since Agnew's body was found in Spencer Park, on the northern outskirts of Christchurch, 12 days after she went missing.

A 35-year-old unemployed man was charged with her murder the next day.

The Agnews spoke of their love for their only daughter, their lingering questions over why someone would take her life, and how they miss her.

"I just love her smile," said Henry Agnew, speaking through a Deaf Association interpreter.

"She loved to smile, and now there's no more smile around. We miss Emma."

The Agnews especially want to thank the community for the outpouring of love and support they have received in the five weeks since her disappearance.

The overwhelming response helped the family as it struggled to come to grips with their daughter's senseless murder. Both parents are deaf, as are their three sons.

Christmas would be a particularly hard day for the Agnews without their bubbly and gregarious 20-year-old daughter, who loved the festivities. To her, Christmas meant packing in as much socialising as humanly possible.

She would spend the day eating and socialising with extended family members who traditionally gather at the Agnews' Templeton home. Agnew would visit her cousins in the afternoon and spend the evening with her many friends.

"She thoroughly enjoyed Christmas Day," said Henry Agnew. "She loved parties."

Since Agnew's disappearance, the family has received over 2500 cards, truckloads of food, donations from businesses, including a barbecue and meat from farmers to cook on it. A fund set up by the Deaf Association, initially to raise $5000, reached nearly $25,000 and brought messages of support from around the world.

"It's impossible for us to write back to all these people, there are just so many," said Henry Agnew. "We want to say a huge thank you to everyone out there for supporting us. It has been so thoughtful."

Louise Agnew knew immediately something was wrong when contact with her daughter suddenly stopped on Thursday, November 15.

"I think it was five or six hours (later) we contacted the police," she said.

"They believed that there was something untoward. The police did a very good job."

Although Agnew had been flatting for about a year, she kept in close contact with her parents through almost daily text messages and frequent visits.

Henry Agnew said: "She would always visit. She had two mobile phones, so she would be busy texting on both phones at the same time. Sometimes she would text me at work and say she's coming to see me, so that was really neat.

"Sometimes she would ask for help if her car had broken down, so I would visit and check out what was wrong with it. The battery might have been flat. She would always contact us."

While the police arrest marked a turning point for the family, it had not eased the sense of loss or the burning question why.

"We are happy a man has been arrested but we are still grieving for Emma," said her mother. "There is no answer to that question."

Henry Agnew said: "We don't know how they met Emma, what happened on that day. We just don't know how that happened."

The Agnews have yet to decide if they will attend the court case next year. Liam James Reid, also known as Julian Heath Edgecombe, made his first brief appearance last month. His second appearance has been rescheduled to the new year. He has yet to plead.

In the meantime, the Agnews' traditional Christmas gathering will go ahead on Tuesday. During the day, extended family members will visit Agnew's grave.

"All our family will be here. It will just be a family event, in remembrance of Emma. For Emma," said a tearful Henry Agnew. "We really miss Emma. Emma was Daddy's girl and she's gone."

- © Fairfax NZ News