Columnists

Quakes up fear of flying

OPINION: Human beings sitting in a steel box at 35,000ft seems about as normal as an octopus managing a construction company.

Here's my most-hated words

Joe Bennett

OPINION: My one criterion was whether, when I heard a certain phrase, I found my fingers reaching for the speaker's carotid artery.

A comedy of errors

michele a'court

OPINION: Dog poo on the wheel of a suitcase goes a long way. All the way from the Waiheke ferry terminal to my bedspread.

Work/life balance revolutionised

Laptop learner

OPINION: The digital workplace is a marvel. It really has revolutionised the work/life balance.

Victorious in quitting nicotine

cigarette

An exasperated non-smoking friend used to threaten to insert a chimney in the top of my head if I didn't quit.

Endless comfort wearing thin

Linwood Ave mural

OPINION: Pep talks, public art, murals . . . there's too much crystal-gazing claptrap in post-quake Christchurch.

Most incompetent holiday booker?

beck eleven

OPINION: How did I end up buying flights from Auckland to Wellington when I'm in Christchurch?

How to write a column

johnny moore

OPINION: If I built columns of stone and concrete I wonder if people would still come up and tell me how they should be done?

Fashion for dummies

Model

OPINION: The world's fashion designers are clearly pretty terrible at their job. That's if you assume their job is to create clothes for people to wear.

Mike Yardley: Cops need guns

Police

OPINION: Every day, five front-line cops are assaulted. That's despicable.

Trauma of a hoarded nostalgia

Wellington houses, generic, homes

OPINION: Having shifted seven times in seven years I've made the decision to never ever, ever shift again.

Hard men can ask for help

mccaw

Sunday News

OPINION: By the Northern Hemisphere tour, Richie McCaw's likely to be sporting a little more facial hair as he promotes Movember.

Self-defeating terror alerts

martin van beynen

MARTIN VAN BEYNEN - The Press

OPINION: So what does a heightened terror threat really mean and what are we supposed to do about it?

The Power-Hunger Games

andrew gunn

ANDREW GUNN - The Press

OPINION: In a time of turmoil, defeat and despair, one man will rise to lead a political party from the ashes. No, wait - three men and a woman.

When women catch man flu

beck eleven

BECK ELEVEN - The Press

OPINION: I admitted defeat. Man Flu is stronger than my will, writes Beck Eleven.

Born to be mild

motorcycle

OPINION: Wanted: Expressions of interest for the New Zealand Motorcycle Party.

Phrases that get my goat

goat meat

OPINION: I must have had the nicest pair of goats in the history of goatkind, or whoever coined the phrase knew nothing of the species.

An app to hook up with nana

smart phone mobile

OPINION: I have an idea for an app called 'Nan-r', which matches people with old ladies so you can go round for tea and soothing words.

Let's charge for carry-ons

People avoiding check-in fees delay boarding

Christchurch Airport control tower

OPINION: Getting on and off a plane takes far longer thanks to the wholesale abuse of carry-on baggage limits.

Tunnel tooters take heart

Mt Vic Tunnel

OPINION: We sound our horns in respect to Phyllis, or for the more lily-livered among us, to keep her ghost away.

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