OPINION: Children make top customers with their lack of critical judgment, trust in adults and slavery to appetites.
OPINION: Ah men. Ah women. Ah love. It does such damage. Here's the story of a friend.
OPINION: Two million is the new "one" when it comes to buying a house in the suburb of Money.
OPINION: A recent weight gain has meant I've rediscovered an old flame of my youth - track pants.
OPINION: When I taught English, no-one wanted to know what I thought about it. Now that I don't, they sometimes do.
The current Brazilian team is short on Brazilianness. Its only artist is Neymar and he's just broken his back. The rest of the team is playing earnest Protestant football.
OPINION: We'd taken a wrong turn - and a wrong turn's always the right thing to do.
OPINION: Travelling is difficult - exponentially more so when you're foreign. And London's Victoria Station is full of foreigners.
OPINION: Welcome to the Fifa 2014 World Cup, with football being but a mere sideshow to big money.
OPINION: An albeit dangerous bike ride down Dyers Pass Rd made me feel like an 8-year-old again.
OPINION: There is now more computing power in your cellphone than there was in Apollo 11.
OPINION: Ten years ago Kim Hill interviewed a dying historian who'd written a book. He was spending the last cancer-racked months of his life promoting it.
The game's rules are simple: Describe the prelude to a global cataclysm. If the future proves you right, you win.
Earthquakes have shaken the hills and storms have lashed them. The once-firm foundations of Lyttelton now feel like fingernails dug into the hillside.
OPINION: Last week's column about a cupcake led to the petrol station's CEO calling me up to apologise.
OPINION: A birthday card from a petrol station wanted to thank me for being one of its "most loyal customers" - an endearing little lie.
A warm towel's a nice indulgence but towels dry perfectly well on a washing line and a heated towel rail is a luxury that costs the world.
Human life may depend on water, but a human house depends on its absence. Water and soft furnishings don't mix.
I play no music at home. If music comes on the car radio I turn it off.
OPINION: Tomorrow I'm going teaching again. Partly because I will be paid but mainly because I miss the classroom.