"You wanna hit the portaloos early," Ali says dryly.
The wounds are slowly healing. The latest ones, that is.
It always looked like Mission IMPossible – and so it proved.
The question was a variation on one levelled at me regularly over 16 years.
OPINION: Hey, did you see those Reds got done in Perth on Thursday night, despite Eto Nabuli scoring a hat-trick of tries?
Good morning, everyone.
I stumbled across two sobering accounts of wartime heroism that had somehow passed me by this week.
OPINION: Closing Cadbury's Dunedin factory shows the company couldn't be further from its roots.
Opinion: If ever there was a classic misnomer, surely it is "pilot whale".
OPINION: Have you ever had an experience that seemed, somehow, other-worldly?
Derek Burrows imagines how the first phone call between US President Donald Trump and Kiwi PM Bill English panned out.
True sporting greatness is something that transcends national boundaries.
'twas Monday morn, and I was torn ...
OPINION: You might be hearing more about Lincoln City.
Lies, lies, lies. They confront us at every turn these days.
"Now is the winter of our discontent made glorious summer by this sun of York ..."
Opinion: I've just been walking around our garden looking at all my wife's roses.
It didn't hit me until I was at home, watching something on Sunday TV I can't even remember now.
OPINION: So, another entertainer has decided they really don't want to perform at US President-elect Donald Trump's inauguration ceremony at the weekend.
"So, what does it feel like to be (insert appropriate age here)?"
OPINION: This is the time of year when numerous crackpots come out of the woodwork and give us their predictions for the year ahead.
Bertie the Biff, Tom Tickle, Oscar; it reads like a slightly macabre roll call of schooldays past.
I think I'm moving up the shortlist. And it's a little worrying, to be honest.
It was never going to happen, as I knew by the time the thought was fully expressed.
OPINION: It's still 10 days to Christmas and already the festive season has left me in a bit of a tangle.
As I turned away from the TV screen I was already in full rant in my head.
OPINION: The heavy clattering of a helicopter passing over seemed to confirm my worst fears.
OPINION: A little piece of my heart has been in Brazil all week.
Opinion: Last week we had another day when we could worship at the altar of consumerism – Black Friday.
OPINION: Does your bed creak?