Editorial: Luis, Luis, no biting
Between mouthfuls, Luis Suarez is quite a good footballer.
Actually, a very good footballer.
Which is what makes the Uruguayan's actions against Italy in the World Cup incomprehensible.
To bite an opponent on the shoulder! What did he hope to achieve? Injure Italian defender Giorgio Chiellini so badly he'd have to go off? Hardly.
A spur-of-the-moment action then, for which there is no explanation?
Yes, let's go with that.
Which leaves us with what happens next, but first, some light relief.
Suarez's reaction. If you were going to secretly bite someone, grabbing your mouth after the event is not the smartest way to do it. And why would you then fall over? Or is that Hollywood 101 for footballers? Roll around on ground no matter what hurts, even if nothing is hurt, which is almost all of the time.
So his reaction, very funny.
As is the fact that 167 people had bet money that Suarez would bite someone. "Let's see, give me a fiver on England leaving early, a tenner on Brazil being in the final, oh, and do you have any odds on anyone biting an opponent?"
"Actually sir, we do. There's this bloke from Uruguay who's done it twice before. How do odds of 175 to 1 sound?"
And what about the guy with the same name whose social media account is being bombed with hate mail? Okay, maybe not so funny.
Fifa isn't laughing, because it now has to punish Suarez, and in so doing will rob the tournament of one of its stars. But Suarez has to go.
And not because of the impact on this game or the actual injury, both of which were minor, but the offence itself. People don't bite people ... unless there is something seriously wrong with them. And no sport wants such people, especially in its showcase event.
Boxer Mike Tyson was banned in the States for more than a year for biting Evander Holyfield's ears (yes, both of them), and South African rugby player Johan le Roux was banned for 18 months for biting Sean Fitzpatrick's ear.
Suarez deserves a similar fate.
The Timaru Herald