Editorial: Holiday of a lifetime

Last updated 05:00 04/03/2014
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Are you disappointed William and Kate aren't visiting Timaru?

Don't be ridiculous

I'm not a royalist, but it could have been fun

I'm heartbroken

No, I'll just head to Christchurch to see them

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"Oh look, Kate, we're off to New Zealand for a holiday."

"Brilliant, I've never been there. For how long?"

"Ten days."

"That's great, William, I can't wait to get in a bit of skiing, maybe some time in those hot pools, take young George for a stroll beside the sea."

"Not sure about all that Kate, they've got this itinerary here for us."

"Oh, what's on it?"

"Well, we arrive on a Monday, and a few of the locals will put on a welcome function at Government House, so not much time for unpacking.

"You could do that the next morning. Actually, we've got all of Tuesday to get over the 25-hour journey. You can go for that wander on the waterfront. I'm sure the nice New Zealanders won't bother you and George, and on Wednesday we get to meet some other parents at a Plunket event.

"We could ask them about cloth nappies."

"Yes, we could. Then on Thursday we fly between islands to a place called Blenheim - I'll have to look that up - where I'll lay a wreath and then we'll look at some old planes before we unveil a portrait of Mummy.

"It looks like we fly back to Wellington that night and then to Auckland the next day. We'll look at some more planes and then you and I get to race some America's Cup yachts. Now that sounds like fun."

"Yes, William. Remind me, their mayor has been in the news for something, hasn't he? I must ask him about it. Now, does that mean we've got the weekend off?"

"No, sorry Kate, looks like we're in a car down to Hamilton, not too far, and then to Cambridge where they've built a new cycling centre.

"I'm not sure but we must get back to Wellington that night somehow and then we fly to Dunedin the next day, meet some All Blacks and then get back on a plane to Queenstown.

"Oh, listen to this. Visit a winery and then go on the Shotover Jet."

"Really, are you sure those two are the right way around William?"

"That's what it says. Anyway, Monday we head to Christchurch for some earthquake memorial tributes, and then we've got the next day off."

"Really, the whole day?"

"Yes, and then we're in Wellington again on the Wednesday, where we go to the police college and say goodbye to all our new friends in the Civic Square."

"You're right, William, doesn't sound much like a holiday. Hang on, you haven't mentioned Timaru, have you? Is it not on there?"

"You're right Kate, it's not. Hang on, let's fix that. There. That day off we had, well, we haven't now."

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- The Timaru Herald


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