The Tourist: Johnny Depp's controversial Golden Globe-winning 'comedy' hits Neon

19:00, Apr 14 2021
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The Tourist is now streaming on Neon.

The Tourist (M, 99mins) Directed by Florian Henckel van Donnersmarck **½

Alexander Pierce is much in demand.

His less-than-honourable banking transactions mean he is now wanted in 14 countries and by various shadowy figures who are a little annoyed at being billions out of pocket. Continual evasion has seen organisations like Scotland Yard turn their attentions to his partner Elise Ward (Angelina Jolie). Wise to their surveillance, Alexander advises her that she needs to find someone of similar height and features to him in order to throw the pursuers off the scent.

Enter widowed maths teacher Frank Tupelo (Johnny Depp). Initially overawed by Elise's forwardness, the avid spy novel reader is eventually more than happy to follow along in this glamour woman's wake. But he is far from prepared for what happens next.

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Depp. Jolie. Paris. Venice. Throw in costumes (including 12 changes of outfits for one of the world's most glamorous clothes hangers) by serial Oscar-winner Colleen Atwood and The Tourist had all the elements in place to truly be a thing of beauty. Which makes it such a shame the script is so predictable and ugly.

Although a remake of little seen 2005 French film Anthony Zimmer, the "dream trio" of Bafta and Oscar-winning writers (The Usual Suspects' Christopher McQuarrie, Gosford Park's Julian Fellows and The Lives of Others’ Florian Henckel van Donnersmarck) appear to aiming for a Thomas Crown Affair-style caper. However, thanks largely to one-dimensional bad guys, telegraphed "twists" and a surprising lack of chemistry between the leads (a nervy, beardy Depp is more Secret Window's Mort Rainey than Captain Jack, while like Evelyn Salt, Elise trades heavily on Jolie's enigmatic persona to the detriment of character depth), Tourist has more in common with Brosnan-era Bond flicks.

Even the combined star power of 2010-era Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp couldn’t make magic out of a predictable and ugly script in The Tourist.
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Even the combined star power of 2010-era Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp couldn’t make magic out of a predictable and ugly script in The Tourist.

That's not to say this 2010 film is without verve – a rooftop pyjama-clad chase is a highlight, while Depp does get a couple of nice one-liners – when told attempted murder is not that serious a crime, he responds with, "not when you downgrade it from murder, but when you upgrade it from room service . . ." – but this modern noir-cum-romantic thriller ends up more pantomime than Charade.

As to how it was even nominated for a Golden Globe at all, especially “best comedy-musical”, well that’s one of the great Hollywood Foreign Press “mysteries” of all time.

The Tourist is now streaming on Neon.