Jaffas are friendly drivers, useless fans, not good team players

The Taranaki Bulls huddle after beating Auckland.
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The Taranaki Bulls huddle after beating Auckland.

 OPINION: Aucklanders are often the nation's punching bag.

They are called city slickers and Jaffas among other similes. I find them really friendly, I mean they drive around at 20-30kmh just so you can chat and meet the person in the car next to you. The quiet ones just toot and do the Auckland wave ... with their fists.

They are radicals too and I like a bit of radical. They don't merge like a zip, they merge like an openside flanker when there's any sight of a gap, they just fly into it. Let's call it the 'Bowl in Boshier', who incidentally played very well on Saturday. Another fist wave and toot of approval.

Or like a good first five, the look-away pass. Just hold the steering wheel with two hands out front and  no eye contact – let's call that the 'Perfect Perofera'. Aucklanders like this, they again toot and fist wave; which is what the Auckland inside backs did to him a couple of times on Saturday afternoon.

More people live in Auckland than the whole of the South Island and they have the world's highest boat ownership per capita. Maybe they were all fishing, because there were not many supporters at Eden Park.

Auckland has 50 volcanos. Maybe this is why they don't play as a team. They are confused. We only have one volcano, we play as a team.

Perhaps I've just solved your rugby crisis, Auckland, and your housing crisis. Flatten out the non-important volcanos and build houses on them.

Anyway, great game. I thought the tight five played much better and the loosies are combining well. Riki Riccatelli would be the ultimate human version of the energiser bunny. But not a bunny - maybe the 'Energiser Bull'. We beat Auckland and beat them well. It was a boisterous post game team huddle and another Taranaki Bulls win (49-38). Momentum is picking up….

On another note, it was great to have the AB's in town, mixing around the province and getting the job done Saturday night. Gee what a great problem; Fifita, Squire or Kaino. Squire for me, purely on his haircut. This coming Friday night we take on former Sharks Loosie Jesse Parete's BOP.

And can someone sort out the 'Go Bulls Go' rift? It sounds amateur as.

Whakatika i ngā Putea - Up the Bulls.

 

 - Stuff

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